The United States of Itini is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by Mari Ajaxin with an iron fist, and remarkable for its anti-smoking policies, ubiquitous missile silos, and compulsory gun ownership. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 3.554 billion Itinians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Education, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Itini City. The average income tax rate is 88.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Itinian economy, worth 506 trillion Theirs a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 142,551 Theirs, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Looting and pillaging are now considered vital intelligence-gathering activities, good-looking doctors are obliged by law to give foot rubs to Mari Ajaxin, naturists are jailed regularly for indecent exposure, and revolutionaries only deal in CyanCatCoin. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Itini's national animal is the Wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Itini is ranked 6,693^rd in the world and 24^th in Democratic Socialist Assembly for Lowest Crime Rates, with 103.78 law-abiding acts per hour.