The Cutely Rebranded Nation of Islonia is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Agathe Fortier with a fair hand, and renowned for its rampant corporate plagiarism, absence of drug laws, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, democratic population of 6.146 billion Islonians enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The enormous, outspoken government prioritizes Education, although Healthcare, Administration, and Environment are also considered important, while Defense and Spirituality receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Alpina. The average income tax rate is 87.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Islonian economy, worth 630 trillion Hearts a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism. Average income is an impressive 102,609 Hearts, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Truck drivers turn their engines off and coast whenever they're going downhill, it's often raining men (hallelujah) in Alpina, increasing numbers of children in Islonia have different eye and hair color to their supposed fathers, and survivors of the Great Internet Flame War often recount horror stories of banhammers and DOS attacks. Crime is totally unknown. Islonia's national animal is the Puppy, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Cutesy.

Islonia is ranked 210,010^th in the world and 249^th in Thaecia for Most Armed, with 0.17 Weapons Per Person.