The Great Sprawling Cradle of Ironsatan is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by The Sovran United-Populus Entity Routine with an iron fist, and renowned for its vat-grown people, ritual sacrifices, and complete lack of prisons. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 17.196 billion Numbers are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Industry, Education, and Administration are also considered important, while International Aid receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Nest-Layer 00. The average income tax rate is 96.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Number economy, worth a remarkable 6,966 trillion Credits a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Uranium Mining. Average income is an amazing 405,121 Credits, with the richest citizens earning 5.1 times as much as the poorest.

The government considers it a sacred duty to video bikini-clad beach swimmers, mandatory spouse selection pairs elderly apparatchiki with stunningly beautiful supermodels, scientists earn more grant money for reproducing old experiments than trying anything new, and unemployed school bus drivers photobomb virtual classroom meetings. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ironsatan's national animal is the Nest Crawler, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is The True Third Law.

Ironsatan is ranked 5,978^th in the world and 18^th in The Glorious Nations of Iwaku for Most Patriotic, with 80.46 flags saluted per person per day.