The Mesmerising Meloncholy of Honeydewistania is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Charlotte Foster Kane with an even hand, and notable for its rum-swilling pirates, complete lack of prisons, and public floggings. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 15.032 billion Honeydewistanians are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The minute, corrupt, pro-business government, or what there is of one, is solely concerned with Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Honeydewopolis. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Honeydewistanian economy, worth a remarkable 5,529 trillion husks a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with significant contributions from Soda Sales, Gambling, and Uranium Mining. Average income is an amazing 367,838 husks, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 3,429,354 per year while the poor average 3,512, a ratio of 976 to 1.

Scenic mountain valleys are flooded with water as damming projects get underway, a Ninja Pirate Awesome Town Tourist Association survey has rated Honeydewistania #1 for number twos, diabetics find the contents of their medications hard to stomach, and politicians are often seen drinking soft drinks at the end of every public address. Crime, especially youth-related, is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Honeydewistania's national animal is the sheep, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is phony Beatlemania.

Honeydewistania is ranked 340,065^th in the world and 2^nd in Ninja Pirate Awesome Town for Most Advanced Public Education, scoring -44.5 on the Edu-tellignce® Test Score.