The Commonwealth of Hintuwan is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by President Bulalacao with a fair hand, and remarkable for its rum-swilling pirates, compulsory military service, and hatred of cheese. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, devout population of 3.018 billion Hintuwanis are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The medium-sized, pro-business government juggles the competing demands of Spirituality, Industry, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Haijing. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 29.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Hintuwani economy, worth 277 trillion piloncitoes a year, is led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Soda Sales, Automobile Manufacturing, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is 91,897 piloncitoes, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 485,617 per year while the poor average 9,235, a ratio of 52.6 to 1.

Pharmacists increasingly claim they are morally obligated to take long lunches, the atmosphere in Hintuwani boardrooms is turning more gay, the serf suggestion box would work better if more serfs were literate, and the government says that Possession is nine-tenths of the Lore. Crime, especially youth-related, is pervasive, probably because of the absence of a police force. Hintuwan's national animal is the carabao, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Roman Catholicism.

Hintuwan is ranked 3,538^th in the world and 9^th in The Western Isles for Fattest Citizens, with 29.59 Obesity Rate.