The Grey Navy of Hetic South is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Charlie Barret with an iron fist, and remarkable for its keen interest in outer space, ubiquitous missile silos, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, devout population of 1.108 billion Hetics are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Tartopia. The average income tax rate is 54.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Southern Hetic economy, worth 121 trillion Bells a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Retail. Average income is an impressive 109,628 Bells, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.3 times as much as the poorest.

Former state leaders include a TV comic and a cowboy actor, the only crimes that get investigated are doughnut heists, brain injury is seen as a desirable outcome rather than a side effect of contact sports, and chickens frolic freely on swings and roundabouts in Tartopia's playgrounds. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Hetic South's national animal is the Dolphin, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to heavy metals seepage into national waterways.

Hetic South is ranked 51,483^rd in the world and 31^st in The Brotherhood of Malice for Smartest Citizens, with 39.56 quips per hour.