by Max Barry

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Most Ignorant Citizens: 557th Largest Pizza Delivery Sector: 870th Largest Retail Industry: 1,163rd
The Republic of
Corporate Police State
We don't need one
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population3.103 billion

CapitalMr Happy Funland
LeaderDear Leader
FaithYo momma


The Republic of Hehateu is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Dear Leader with an iron fist, and remarkable for its rum-swilling pirates, deadly medical pandemics, and avowedly heterosexual populace. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 3.103 billion Hehateuans are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, pro-business, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, with Industry and Law & Order also on the agenda, while Social Policy and Welfare aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Mr Happy Funland. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 16.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Hehateuan economy, worth 565 trillion dubloons a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Retail, Gambling, and Pizza Delivery. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an impressive 182,213 dubloons, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 937,700 per year while the poor average 19,339, a ratio of 48.5 to 1.

Bleach is the nation's most common pesticide, the nation has recently been attributed to the funding of terrorist organisations, the Foreign Ministry thinks an eye for an eye is a blindingly good idea, and male celebrity chefs are laughed at for their lack of manliness. Crime, especially youth-related, is almost non-existent, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Hehateu's national animal is the Mole, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Yo momma.

Hehateu is ranked 8,135th in the world and 28th in The Invaders for Most Primitive, scoring 86.24 on the Scary Big Number Scale.

Most Ignorant Citizens: 557thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 870thLargest Retail Industry: 1,163rdLargest Gambling Industry: 1,259thFattest Citizens: 1,278thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1,463rdMost Corrupt Governments: 1,586thTop
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1,781stHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1,903rdMost Avoided: 2,042ndLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 2,586thHighest Disposable Incomes: 2,903rdLargest Manufacturing Sector: 3,478thRudest Citizens: 3,980thLargest Black Market: 4,751stMost Advanced Defense Forces: 4,944thLargest Mining Sector: 4,951stMost Armed: 5,536thMost Subsidized Industry: 7,155thHighest Average Incomes: 7,515thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 7,775thMost Primitive: 8,135thTop
Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 8,661stGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 8,744thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 9,075thMost Efficient Economies: 9,410thMost Devout: 11,289thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 12,516thMost Pro-Market: 14,561st
Fattest Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 3rd in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 3rd in the regionTop
Highest Disposable Incomes: 4th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 4th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 4th in the regionRudest Citizens: 5th in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 7th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 8th in the regionMost Avoided: 9th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 9th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 10th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 10th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 12th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 12th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 12th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 13th in the regionMost Influential: 13th in the regionLargest Black Market: 15th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 17th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 17th in the regionMost Armed: 18th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 18th in the regionTop
Most Devout: 22nd in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 24th in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 24th in the regionMost Primitive: 28th in the regionLargest Governments: 29th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 29th in the regionMost Pro-Market: 36th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Hehateu was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Primitive.
  • : Hehateu was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Greatest Rich-Poor Divides.
  • : Hehateu was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Primitive.
  • : Hehateu endorsed The Dominion of Nanbaric.
  • : Hehateu was endorsed by The Dominion of Nanbaric.
  • : Hehateu endorsed Great northlands.
  • : Hehateu was endorsed by Great northlands.
  • : Hehateu was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry.
  • : Hehateu's influence in The Invaders rose from "Squire" to "Apprentice".
  • : Hehateu was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Pro-Market.


World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 2 » Rain Delay and Nanbaric.

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