The New Republic of Hazarium is a massive, safe nation, ruled by The Senate with an even hand, and remarkable for its complete lack of prisons, pith helmet sales, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed population of 3.482 billion Hazarians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Hazar-Prime. The average income tax rate is 69.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Hazariumian economy, worth 440 trillion Hazers a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Furniture Restoration, and Retail. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 126,432 Hazers, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.4 times as much as the poorest.

The endangered saltwater humpback Mushroom is only seen in captivity programs, email killed the radio star, grinning punters say that casino roulette is the greatest high that life has to offer, and sly spies try to rely on national allies so that they don't die. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Hazarium's national animal is the Mushroom, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Sacrificial Dan.

Hazarium is ranked 34,258^th in the world and 1,149^th in The North Pacific for Highest Drug Use, scoring 98.4 on the Pineapple Fondness Rating.