The Commonwealth of Hastur is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by General Chaofrarc with an iron fist, and renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, irreverence towards religion, and stringent health and safety legislation. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 8.571 billion Hasturians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Sraphport. The average income tax rate is 62.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The large but inefficient Hasturian economy, worth 321 trillion florins a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a slick, highly efficient, fairly diversified black market in Information Technology, Retail, Arms Manufacturing, and Cheese Exports. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 37,561 florins, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The Holy Office of the Inquisition is the highest court in the land, prolonged government investigations are a common revenge tactic among spurned spouses, employers are finding it hard to screen candidates now that everyone gets A grades in their exams, and the police use sound cannons and mortars to deal with loud parties. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Hastur's national animal is the turtle, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to heavy metals seepage into national waterways.

Hastur is ranked 15,416^th in the world and 3^rd in Gatehouse by the P2TM for Most Stationary, with 1,265.88298844548 Days.