The CULT OF WARFSTACHE of Haruhi Japan is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by Wilford Warfstache with an iron fist, and renowned for its compulsory military service, keen interest in outer space, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical population of 3.804 billion Warfstache are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Markiplier Mansion. The average income tax rate is 92.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Warstache economy, worth a remarkable 1,239 trillion Pink moustaches a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Retail. Black market activity is rampant. Average income is an amazing 325,731 Pink moustaches, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.1 times as much as the poorest.

Promising seven years of bad luck leads to seven years of community service, Wilford Warfstache can't hear a thing when the unwashed masses throw rocks at the new state limousine, collisions between bicycles and carnival floats are on the rise, and atheistic refugees haven't got a prayer of being granted asylum. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Haruhi Japan's national animal is the Chica, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Nihilism.

Haruhi Japan is ranked 225,265^th in the world and 61^st in The Vincence Empire for Most Primitive, scoring -642.64 on the Scary Big Number Scale.