by Max Barry

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Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 917th Largest Manufacturing Sector: 1,614th Largest Black Market: 2,133rd
The Insane Autocracy of
Father Knows Best State
Stop, Hammer Time!
Influence
Squire
Secretary of Foreign Affairs
Region
Civil Rights
Some
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Unheard Of

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Hammer Britannia

Population5.464 billion

CapitalBrixton
LeaderPink
FaithTo be honest I don't know

CurrencyHuman Baby
AnimalUr mom

The Insane Autocracy of Hammer Britannia is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Pink with an iron fist, and remarkable for its ritual sacrifices, compulsory military service, and complete lack of prisons. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 5.464 billion Brits are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The relatively small, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Industry, Education, and Administration are also considered important, while Social Policy and Spirituality receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Brixton. The average income tax rate is 49.0%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient British economy, worth a remarkable 1,004 trillion Human Babies a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, fairly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Retail. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 183,817 Human Babies, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.8 times as much as the poorest.

First-time moms are expected to be experienced parents from day one, residents of newly dried out bays live in fear of leaky dikes, conspiracy nuts claim that the government is trying to bring about an end to civilisation, and the police think a properly conducted criminal investigation is a real pain. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Hammer Britannia's national animal is the Ur mom, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is To be honest I don't know.

Hammer Britannia is ranked 170,713th in the world and 39th in The Labyrinth for Largest Welfare Programs, scoring -16.12 on the Safety Net Mesh Density Rating.

Top
1%
Largest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 917thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1,614thTop
5%
Largest Black Market: 2,133rdLargest Information Technology Sector: 3,305thMost Avoided: 3,422ndMost Advanced Defense Forces: 4,036thMost Subsidized Industry: 4,382ndLargest Retail Industry: 4,691stMost Corrupt Governments: 5,061stMost Armed: 6,256thMost Scientifically Advanced: 6,686thMost Efficient Economies: 7,019thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 7,074thHighest Average Incomes: 7,328thHighest Disposable Incomes: 7,716thHighest Poor Incomes: 7,805thTop
10%
Highest Economic Output: 13,853rdLargest Mining Sector: 16,507thMost Secular: 17,459th
Top
5%
Largest Information Technology Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionMost Avoided: 2nd in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 2nd in the regionMost Armed: 2nd in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionTop
10%
Largest Black Market: 3rd in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 3rd in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 4th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 4th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 4th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Hammer Britannia, the police think a properly conducted criminal investigation is a real pain.
  • : Following new legislation in Hammer Britannia, conspiracy nuts claim that the government is trying to bring about an end to civilisation.
  • : Hammer Britannia was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Largest Mining Sector.
  • : Following new legislation in Hammer Britannia, official maps have to be revised on a weekly basis.
  • : Following new legislation in Hammer Britannia, residents of newly dried out bays live in fear of leaky dikes.
  • : Following new legislation in Hammer Britannia, first-time moms are expected to be experienced parents from day one.
  • : Following new legislation in Hammer Britannia, an increasing number of citizens believe the world is flat.
  • : Hammer Britannia was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Highest Unexpected Death Rate.
  • : Following new legislation in Hammer Britannia, official maps have to be revised on a weekly basis.
  • : Following new legislation in Hammer Britannia, the government spends twice as much reclaiming lost settlements from the sea as it could've on coastal defences.

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