The People's Republic of Habanan is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Sparax Epolonius Jr with an iron fist, and notable for its pith helmet sales, compulsory military service, and devotion to social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 6.16 billion Habananians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kazumri. The average income tax rate is 95.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Habananian economy, worth a remarkable 1,095 trillion Haban dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is broadly diversified, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an impressive 177,906 Haban dollars, with the richest citizens earning 5.4 times as much as the poorest.

Sailors spend their shore leave helping old ladies cross the street, gift hampers filled with delicious beef jerky are sent to newly communist nations, the Counter-Terrorism Unit has been nicknamed "Big Bad Wolf" for its tendency towards urban demolition, and surfing lessons include how to ward off sharks. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Habanan's national animal is the Habanan Lion, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Lord Sparax Epolonius.

Habanan is ranked 89,973^rd in the world and 4,250^th in The North Pacific for Largest Automobile Manufacturing Sector, scoring 1,305.06 on the Henry Ford Productivity Index.