by Max Barry

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Largest Welfare Programs: 420th Highest Foreign Aid Spending: 659th Most Advanced Public Transport: 799th
The Great United Provinces of
Left-wing Utopia
Everyone is welcome!
Civil Rights
Political Freedom
Widely Abused

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Greater Tuvalu

Population8.634 billion


CurrencyTuvaluan Dollar
AnimalBottlenose Dolphin

The Great United Provinces of Greater Tuvalu is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, remarkable for its anti-smoking policies, complete lack of prisons, and hatred of cheese. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful, devout population of 8.634 billion Greater Tuvaluans are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, liberal, socially-minded, outspoken morass — juggles the competing demands of Education, Welfare, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Funafuti. The average income tax rate is 98.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Greater Tuvaluan economy, worth a remarkable 1,241 trillion Tuvaluan Dollars a year, is highly specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing and Information Technology. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 143,771 Tuvaluan Dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Nouveau riche farmers diligently take care of their golden calf herds, the horniness of the great-horned Bottlenose Dolphin is considered a national priority, the nation's biggest export is stupidity, and the nation locks people up and tells them they're mad for compassion's sake. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Greater Tuvalu's national animal is the Bottlenose Dolphin, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

Greater Tuvalu is ranked 150,201st in the world and 25th in Future Earth for Highest Workforce Participation Rate, with 33.77 Workforce Participation Rate.

Largest Welfare Programs: 420thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 659thMost Advanced Public Transport: 799thMost Cheerful Citizens: 1,039thNicest Citizens: 1,147thMost Pacifist: 1,203rdMost Compassionate Citizens: 1,320thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 1,386thTop
Most Rebellious Youth: 1,678thMost Inclusive: 1,753rdHighest Average Tax Rates: 1,947thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 2,147thMost Advanced Public Education: 2,522ndSafest: 2,532ndBest Weather: 2,978thLargest Governments: 2,995thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 3,263rdLongest Average Lifespans: 3,606thLeast Corrupt Governments: 3,770thMost Beautiful Environments: 3,823rdMost Cultured: 4,031stMost Developed: 4,123rdHealthiest Citizens: 4,126thMost Subsidized Industry: 4,662ndLowest Crime Rates: 5,133rdMost Politically Free: 6,200thMost Devout: 6,541stHighest Poor Incomes: 6,542ndSmartest Citizens: 7,062ndTop
Highest Economic Output: 10,793rdNudest: 11,798thLargest Publishing Industry: 13,487thHighest Average Incomes: 13,674thMost Extreme: 14,733rd
Highest Poor Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Politically Free: 1st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 1st in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 1st in the regionMost Extreme: 1st in the regionMost Devout: 1st in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 1st in the regionSafest: 1st in the regionLargest Populations: 1st in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 1st in the regionMost Cultured: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 1st in the regionLargest Governments: 1st in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 1st in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 1st in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 1st in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 1st in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 1st in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Inclusive: 1st in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 1st in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Pacifist: 1st in the regionNicest Citizens: 1st in the regionTop
Most Extensive Civil Rights: 2nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 2nd in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 2nd in the regionMost Developed: 2nd in the regionBest Weather: 2nd in the regionNudest: 2nd in the regionMost Income Equality: 2nd in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 2nd in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 2nd in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 2nd in the regionSmartest Citizens: 2nd in the region

National Happenings

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