The Eternal Republicium of Great United States is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Ernest Jeremy with a fair hand, and renowned for its smutty television, complete lack of prisons, and irreverence towards religion. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic population of 1.199 billion Americans enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The medium-sized, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of District of Columbia. The average income tax rate is 28.3%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The thriving American economy, worth 83.9 trillion Boreums a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Information Technology, and Pizza Delivery. Average income is 69,945 Boreums, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

A government program is underway to revitalize Great United States's beaches, Ernest Jeremy's exquisite office door is replaced monthly due to angry petitioners, engineers ask liberal arts majors "Do you want fries with that?", and the government is forced to pander to the will of every fruitcake politician. Crime, especially youth-related, is a problem, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Great United States's national animal is the Golden Eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Great United States is ranked 85,176^th in the world and 3,626^th in Osiris for Healthiest Citizens, with 3.3 bananas ingested per day.