The United States of Grand land of the Toes is a huge, socially progressive nation, remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, national health service, and strictly enforced bedtime. The hard-nosed, hard-working, devout population of 626 million Grand land of the Toesians are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The relatively small government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Spirituality, and Education. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 19.5%.

The powerhouse Grand land of the Toesian economy, worth 43.8 trillion carpets a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Pizza Delivery industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Gambling, and Book Publishing. Average income is 70,011 carpets, with the richest citizens earning 7.4 times as much as the poorest.

Employers are keenest on employees who lack family values, government bureaucrats devote many man-hours to trying to measure unquantifiables, people think garlic bread counts as one of their "five a day", and coffee-addicted citizens look forward to baristas getting their name wrong at local coffee shops. Crime, especially youth-related, is almost non-existent. Grand land of the Toes's national animal is the bugz, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Grand land of the Toes is ranked 72,266^th in the world and 67^th in Federation of Martian Colonies for Largest Basket Weaving Sector, scoring 4,007.78 on the Hickory Productivity Index.