by Max Barry

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Largest Soda Pop Sector: 609thLargest Black Market: 737thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 812th
The Nine Hells of
Father Knows Best State
Decimation towards impurity
Influence
Sprat
Civil Rights
Some
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Outlawed

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Gopnikea

Population6.549 billion

CapitalStrateigor
LeaderNikola Hadares
FaithMisanthropy

CurrencyPreciznost
AnimalOsmius

The Nine Hells of Gopnikea is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Nikola Hadares with an iron fist, and notable for its deadly medical pandemics, free-roaming dinosaurs, and otherworldly petting zoo. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, cheerful, devout population of 6.549 billion Sepulcrists are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Strateigor. The average income tax rate is 95.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Sepulcrisian economy, worth a remarkable 2,498 trillion Preciznosts a year, is fairly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Tourism, Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 381,480 Preciznosts, with the richest citizens earning 7.7 times as much as the poorest.

Corporations claim the third ounce of any metal traded in a wicker-cone on the Sunday of a full moon as a charitable expense, pirates armed with sonar-guided semi-autonomous torpedos and laser weapons systems are often seen capturing fishing trawlers, the homeless more often beg for mercy than money, and annual government budgets include a sizeable spend on "making things look fabulous". Crime is totally unknown. Gopnikea's national animal is the Osmius, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Misanthropy.

Gopnikea is ranked 2,534th in the world and 20th in Confederation of Corrupt Dictators for Most Armed, with 13.77 Weapons Per Person.

Top
1%
Largest Soda Pop Sector: 609thLargest Black Market: 737thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 812thHighest Average Incomes: 935thMost Subsidized Industry: 938thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1,128thLargest Publishing Industry: 1,133rdMost Cultured: 1,411thMost Advanced Public Education: 1,421stMost Efficient Economies: 1,751stLargest Cheese Export Sector: 1,889thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 2,000thLargest Information Technology Sector: 2,180thMost Devout: 2,408thTop
5%
Most Armed: 2,534thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 2,598thMost Valuable International Artwork: 2,708thMost Corrupt Governments: 2,765thLargest Retail Industry: 3,013thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 3,118thMost Scientifically Advanced: 3,125thFattest Citizens: 3,129thLargest Governments: 3,424thMost Cheerful Citizens: 3,579thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 3,743rdMost Advanced Public Transport: 4,280thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 4,357thMost Inclusive: 4,597thSmartest Citizens: 4,856thHighest Average Tax Rates: 5,384thMost Beautiful Environments: 5,464thMost Rebellious Youth: 5,785thHighest Economic Output: 6,255thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 6,261stMost Developed: 6,515thHighest Poor Incomes: 6,744thLargest Welfare Programs: 6,855thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 7,054thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 9,162ndTop
10%
Largest Agricultural Sector: 18,509thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 22,216th
Top
1%
Largest Soda Pop Sector: 1st in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 2nd in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 2nd in the regionMost Inclusive: 3rd in the regionTop
5%
Most Eco-Friendly Governments: 4th in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 4th in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 5th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 5th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 5th in the regionMost Cultured: 5th in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 6th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 7th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 7th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 8th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 8th in the regionLargest Black Market: 9th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 11th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 12th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 13th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 14th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 15th in the regionTop
10%
Highest Wealthy Incomes: 16th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 17th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 20th in the regionMost Armed: 20th in the regionLargest Governments: 22nd in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 23rd in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 23rd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 24th in the regionMost Devout: 24th in the regionFattest Citizens: 24th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 25th in the regionHighest Drug Use: 26th in the regionMost Developed: 29th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 30th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Gopnikea, annual government budgets include a sizeable spend on "making things look fabulous".
  • : Following new legislation in Gopnikea, the homeless more often beg for mercy than money.
  • : Following new legislation in Gopnikea, pirates armed with sonar-guided semi-autonomous torpedos and laser weapons systems are often seen capturing fishing trawlers.
  • : Following new legislation in Gopnikea, corporations claim the third ounce of any metal traded in a wicker-cone on the Sunday of a full moon as a charitable expense.
  • : Following new legislation in Gopnikea, citizens are prohibited from raising their voice above thirty decibels in commercial districts.
  • : Gopnikea was endorsed by The United Socialist Republic of Zalkland.
  • : Gopnikea voted against the World Assembly Resolution "Freedom Of Association".
  • : Following new legislation in Gopnikea, the new Liquor Legitimacy Office is besieged with job applications from people who have experience in "statistical sampling methods".
  • : Following new legislation in Gopnikea, millions of devastated 7-year-olds are denied astronaut and ballerina training.
  • : Following new legislation in Gopnikea, bouncers at the door of the sweet shop warn five-year-olds not to cause trouble.

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