The Federal Republic of Gin Tonic is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Michele with an even hand, and renowned for its compulsory military service, free-roaming dinosaurs, and stringent health and safety legislation. The humorless population of 3.252 billion Gin Tonicians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cremona. The average income tax rate is 92.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Gin Tonician economy, worth 582 trillion Gin-Dollars a year, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 179,035 Gin-Dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

4-year-olds are often found reminiscing about the 'good old days', all guns must be registered, doctors prescribe medicines but they rarely dispense hope or compassion, and there is a heavy social stigma attached to e-cigarettes. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Gin Tonic's national animal is the Eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Gintonism.

Gin Tonic is ranked 12,471^st in the world and 576^th in The North Pacific for Largest Welfare Programs, scoring 4,248.31 on the Safety Net Mesh Density Rating.