The Lily-White Skin of French Speedo Man is a gargantuan, orderly nation, notable for its compulsory military service, absence of drug laws, and punitive income tax rates. The cynical population of 45.002 billion French Speedo Manians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.

The enormous, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Spirituality, Law & Order, and Defense. The average income tax rate is 62.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The large but underdeveloped French Speedo Manian economy, worth 867 trillion bum cleavages a year, is highly specialized and led by the Furniture Restoration industry, with significant contributions from Basket Weaving, Woodchip Exports, and Pizza Delivery. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 19,286 bum cleavages, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Elections have been outlawed. Crime, especially youth-related, is almost non-existent, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. French Speedo Man's national animal is the albino sunbather.

French Speedo Man is ranked 166,680^th in the world and 4,309^th in the Rejected Realms for Lowest Crime Rates, with 59.57 law-abiding acts per hour.