The Protectorate of Free Tepertopia is a colossal, genial nation, ruled by Gerhard von Selingen with a fair hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, frequent executions, and compulsory military service. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic population of 8.547 billion Tepertopians enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The medium-sized, outspoken government prioritizes Education, with Administration, Welfare, and Industry also on the agenda, while Spirituality and International Aid are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Happelstein. The average income tax rate is 31.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Tepertopian economy, worth 939 trillion Crowns a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Retail, Automobile Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 109,902 Crowns, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.2 times as much as the poorest.

Kindergartners' favourite dance move is the stop-drop-and-roll, the World Protectorate Games have been won again by Free Tepertopia as no other country cares enough to compete, the new 'Things We Stole From Other Countries' exhibition at the National Museum of Antiquities is a hit, and teams of painters are converting road signs from horse lengths to kilometers. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Free Tepertopia's national animal is the housecat, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Freedom.

Free Tepertopia is ranked 123,334^th in the world and 26^th in The Free Nations Region for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry, scoring 2,436.57 on the Spitz-Pollish Productivity Index.