by Max Barry

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Most Cheerful Citizens: 4,769th Most Inclusive: 4,823rd Nicest Citizens: 5,624th
The Imperial Federation of
Father Knows Best State
No official motto
Influence
Sprat
Region
Civil Rights
Excellent
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Few

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

First American Empire

Population926 million

CapitalSan Francisco
LeaderEmperor Norton VII

CurrencyDollar
AnimalGrizzly Bear

The Imperial Federation of First American Empire is a huge, socially progressive nation, ruled by Emperor Norton VII with an iron fist, and notable for its multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, infamous sell-swords, and irreverence towards religion. The compassionate, cynical population of 926 million Americans are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Social Policy. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of San Francisco. The average income tax rate is 72.3%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Imperial economy, worth 104 trillion Dollars a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Basket Weaving, and Woodchip Exports. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 113,030 Dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

Former state leaders include a TV comic and a cowboy actor, dinosaur breeders have a yabba-dabba-doo gay old time in First American Empire, children dream of becoming physicians and physicists, and snooze factory is now prison lingo for rehabilitation center. Crime is totally unknown. First American Empire's national animal is the Grizzly Bear, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

First American Empire is ranked 15,033rd in the world and 72nd in Gay for Longest Average Lifespans, with 79.61 Years.

Top
5%
Most Cheerful Citizens: 4,769thMost Inclusive: 4,823rdNicest Citizens: 5,624thMost Compassionate Citizens: 6,059thTop
10%
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 10,214thMost Developed: 11,306thLargest Welfare Programs: 11,980thHealthiest Citizens: 12,887thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 13,034thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 13,074thMost Scientifically Advanced: 13,213thMost Pacifist: 13,717thLargest Information Technology Sector: 14,973rdLongest Average Lifespans: 15,033rd
Top
10%
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 13th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 20th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in First American Empire, snooze factory is now prison lingo for rehabilitation center.
  • : Following new legislation in First American Empire, children dream of becoming physicians and physicists.
  • : First American Empire was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Politically Apathetic Citizens.
  • : Following new legislation in First American Empire, dinosaur breeders have a yabba-dabba-doo gay old time in First American Empire.
  • : Following new legislation in First American Empire, former state leaders include a TV comic and a cowboy actor.
  • : Following new legislation in First American Empire, people say chess victor Emperor Norton VII can kill you with mind-bullets.
  • : Following new legislation in First American Empire, tourists often cite 'hiding money in an off-shore banking account' as their main reason to visit the nation.
  • : Following new legislation in First American Empire, the government's foreign policy statements are less threatening than a World Assembly cease-and-desist letter.
  • : Following new legislation in First American Empire, excessive wheelchair ramps on government buildings have been compared to theme park attractions.
  • : Following new legislation in First American Empire, incidents involving lethal string attacks have gone way up.

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