by Max Barry

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Most Cheerful Citizens: 6,664th Nicest Citizens: 7,436th Most Compassionate Citizens: 7,972nd
The Empire of
Libertarian Police State
Liberty and Justice for All
Influence
Sprat
Region
Civil Rights
Superb
Economy
All-Consuming
Political Freedom
Unheard Of

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

First American Empire

Population386 million

CapitalSan Francisco

CurrencyDollar
AnimalGrizzly Bear

The Empire of First American Empire is a huge, orderly nation, renowned for its smutty television, irreverence towards religion, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, cynical population of 386 million Americans are proud of their wide-ranging civil freedoms, and those who aren't tend to be dragged off the streets by men in dark suits and hustled into cars with tinted windows.

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of San Francisco. The average income tax rate is 62.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming Imperial economy, worth 35.7 trillion Dollars a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Woodchip Exports, and Basket Weaving. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 92,564 Dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.3 times as much as the poorest.

Matryoshka dolls resembling nested Death Stars are commonly sold, there is an abondance of ackawi and zartschmelzend in every Imperial grocery store, the price of takeaway food quadruples after 6pm, and billions of Dollars are being blown on orbital weapons development. Crime is totally unknown. First American Empire's national animal is the Grizzly Bear, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

First American Empire is ranked 6,664th in the world and 45th in Gay for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 56.96 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.

Top
5%
Most Cheerful Citizens: 6,664thNicest Citizens: 7,436thMost Compassionate Citizens: 7,972ndTop
10%
Most Inclusive: 9,230thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 9,948thLargest Welfare Programs: 10,382ndMost Pacifist: 11,184thMost Rebellious Youth: 12,129th
Top
10%
Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 19th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in First American Empire, billions of Dollars are being blown on orbital weapons development.
  • : Following new legislation in First American Empire, the price of takeaway food quadruples after 6pm.
  • : Following new legislation in First American Empire, there is an abondance of ackawi and zartschmelzend in every Imperial grocery store.
  • : Following new legislation in First American Empire, matryoshka dolls resembling nested Death Stars are commonly sold.
  • : Following new legislation in First American Empire, the government has instituted 'traveller reservations' across the country.
  • : Following new legislation in First American Empire, the government is funding experimental battery technology while the power grid continues to crumble.
  • : Following new legislation in First American Empire, five-year-olds who refuse to line up on command get gold stars.
  • : Following new legislation in First American Empire, the government spends billions to protect First American Empire from a disaster that is one in a million.
  • : Following new legislation in First American Empire, archaeological discoveries are often followed by mysterious hamster abductions.
  • : Following new legislation in First American Empire, country folk are sent to obligatory boarding schools to learn how to be civilized.

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