by Max Barry

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Rudest Citizens: 6thMost Armed: 63rdHighest Crime Rates: 67th
The Christmas Planes of
Corporate Bordello
Civil Rights
Political Freedom
Widely Abused

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Eternal Dam Nation

Population5.186 billion

CapitalNonya Damn Business Conglomerate
Faithi don't give a damn


The Christmas Planes of Eternal Dam Nation is a colossal, socially progressive nation, ruled by dickolas with a fair hand, and notable for its sprawling nuclear power plants, digital currency, and enslaved workforce. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless population of 5.186 billion bois are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The minute, corrupt, pro-business, outspoken government, or what there is of one, juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Nonya Damn Business Conglomerate. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Eternally Damned economy, worth a remarkable 1,882 trillion damns a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Soda Sales. Average income is an amazing 362,925 damns, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 3,356,937 per year while the poor average 3,808, a ratio of 881 to 1.

Cigarettes are dead-cheap, inheritance tax has recently been abolished, the diplomatic corps stinks, and the weather in Nonya Damn Business Conglomerate is always 'pigeons with a chance of droppings'. Crime, especially youth-related, is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Eternal Dam Nation's national animal is the Cow, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is i don't give a damn.

Eternal Dam Nation is ranked 1,913th in the world and 13th in the Rejected Realms for Most Pro-Market, scoring 98 on the Rand Index.

Rudest Citizens: 6thMost Armed: 63rdHighest Crime Rates: 67thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 73rdHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 81stLargest Retail Industry: 84thFattest Citizens: 108thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 160thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 180thMost Avoided: 189thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 210thMost Rebellious Youth: 314thHighest Disposable Incomes: 358thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 614thLargest Gambling Industry: 699thMost Scientifically Advanced: 1,013thMost Valuable International Artwork: 1,060thHighest Average Incomes: 1,065thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 1,107thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1,205thMost Corrupt Governments: 1,259thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1,349thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1,362ndLargest Mining Sector: 1,772ndMost Pro-Market: 1,913thTop
Highest Workforce Participation Rate: 2,212thLargest Information Technology Sector: 2,453rdMost Secular: 2,819thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 3,182ndLargest Insurance Industry: 3,770thNudest: 5,895thLargest Agricultural Sector: 6,543rdSmartest Citizens: 6,613thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 7,404thHighest Economic Output: 8,065thLargest Publishing Industry: 8,317thTop
Most Inclusive: 11,334thMost Politically Free: 12,300thHighest Drug Use: 14,902ndMost Efficient Economies: 16,706thLargest Black Market: 17,149th
Rudest Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Armed: 2nd in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 4th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 4th in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 5th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 6th in the regionFattest Citizens: 7th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 8th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 9th in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 10th in the regionMost Pro-Market: 13th in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 14th in the regionMost Avoided: 15th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 18th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 21st in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 30th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 31st in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 31st in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 32nd in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 32nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 41st in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 44th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 46th in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 48th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 53rd in the regionTop
Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 57th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 65th in the regionMost Secular: 94th in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 95th in the regionMost Politically Free: 117th in the regionHighest Drug Use: 138th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 148th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 158th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 168th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 174th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 190th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 203rd in the regionMost Inclusive: 228th in the regionNudest: 245th in the regionTop
Most Extreme: 359th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 458th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Eternal Dam Nation, the weather in Nonya Damn Business Conglomerate is always 'pigeons with a chance of droppings'.
  • : Following new legislation in Eternal Dam Nation, the diplomatic corps stinks.
  • : Following new legislation in Eternal Dam Nation, inheritance tax has recently been abolished.
  • : Following new legislation in Eternal Dam Nation, cigarettes are dead-cheap.
  • : Following new legislation in Eternal Dam Nation, all the world's a stage for Eternally Damned political theatrics.
  • : Following new legislation in Eternal Dam Nation, corruption is a game of two halves.
  • : Following new legislation in Eternal Dam Nation, 'The Anti-Government Hour' is a popular programme on many of Eternal Dam Nation's radio stations.
  • : Following new legislation in Eternal Dam Nation, the law says it's okay to sell a bomb to a terrorist so long as they promise not to detonate it.
  • : Following new legislation in Eternal Dam Nation, late night adverts for breast milk co-ops regularly win pornography industry awards.
  • : Following new legislation in Eternal Dam Nation, teenagers across the country are celebrating the defeat of a national curfew bill.


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