The Vestrugatten Federation of Esplandia is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by King Sherwin V with an iron fist, and notable for its keen interest in outer space, flagrant waste-dumping, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 5.94 billion Esplandians are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Karthied. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 69.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Esplandish economy, worth 886 trillion Crown Florents a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Cheese Exports industry, with major contributions from Retail, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. Black market activity is extensive. Average income is an impressive 149,262 Crown Florents, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 524,640 per year while the poor average 30,776, a ratio of 17.0 to 1.

The nation's forests are full of treasure hunters in military-grade survival gear, prisoners can't do number twos without their "toilet buddy" present, animated paperclips interrupt word processing to remind you they are just automated tip-tools, and hedge fund managers are diversifying into herbaceous borders. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Esplandia's national animal is the Falcon, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Aelostianism.

Esplandia is ranked 153,317^th in the world and 8,738^th in The North Pacific for Safest, scoring 36.3 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.