by Max Barry

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Most Valuable International Artwork: 250thHighest Crime Rates: 497thRudest Citizens: 662nd
The Kingdom of
Freedom for all
King William I
Civil Rights
Political Freedom
Widely Abused

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population3.252 billion

CapitalEshialand City
LeaderKing William I


The Kingdom of Eshialand is a massive, socially progressive nation, ruled by King William I with a fair hand, and notable for its complete lack of prisons, otherworldly petting zoo, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic, cheerful, devout population of 3.252 billion Eshians live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The tiny, corrupt, liberal, pro-business, outspoken government prioritizes Industry, although Administration, Education, and Welfare are also considered important, while Law & Order and Defense are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Eshialand City. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 9.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Eshian economy, worth 528 trillion dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Retail, Book Publishing, and Soda Sales. Black market activity is notable. Average income is an impressive 162,499 dollars, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 493,399 per year while the poor average 41,590, a ratio of 11.9 to 1.

Chickens roam the streets freely, pristine wilderness has been trashed in the quest for cheaper oil, election ballot papers are so long that unused ones are recycled as toilet roll, and the country routinely whitewashes uncomfortable parts of its history. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Eshialand's national animal is the owl, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Pastafarianism.

Eshialand is ranked 40,335th in the world and 35th in The Order of the Grey Wardens for Greatest Rich-Poor Divides, with 11.86 Rich To Poor Income Ratio.

Most Valuable International Artwork: 250thHighest Crime Rates: 497thRudest Citizens: 662ndMost Armed: 887thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 949thFattest Citizens: 1,207thHighest Drug Use: 1,263rdMost Extensive Civil Rights: 1,286thMost Rebellious Youth: 1,452ndLargest Retail Industry: 1,468thMost Cheerful Citizens: 1,952ndLargest Soda Pop Sector: 2,341stTop
Largest Pizza Delivery Sector: 2,696thHighest Disposable Incomes: 3,015thMost Avoided: 3,036thLargest Gambling Industry: 5,852ndNicest Citizens: 6,076thMost Inclusive: 6,265thLargest Publishing Industry: 6,272ndMost Cultured: 6,523rdHighest Wealthy Incomes: 6,689thLargest Information Technology Sector: 7,190thMost Efficient Economies: 7,746thMost Scientifically Advanced: 8,532ndMost Compassionate Citizens: 8,557thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 9,444thNudest: 9,560thHighest Average Incomes: 11,742ndTop
Most Corrupt Governments: 13,653rdMost Politically Free: 15,406thMost Extreme: 15,902ndSmartest Citizens: 16,535thMost Subsidized Industry: 16,822ndLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 16,911thMost Pro-Market: 17,361stLargest Black Market: 18,812thMost Devout: 19,460th
Highest Crime Rates: 1st in the regionRudest Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Armed: 1st in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 1st in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 1st in the regionMost Extensive Civil Rights: 1st in the regionHighest Drug Use: 1st in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 2nd in the regionFattest Citizens: 2nd in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 2nd in the regionTop
Highest Disposable Incomes: 3rd in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 3rd in the regionMost Avoided: 3rd in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 4th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 5th in the regionMost Politically Free: 5th in the regionMost Inclusive: 5th in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 5th in the regionMost Extreme: 6th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 6th in the regionNicest Citizens: 6th in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 7th in the regionMost Cultured: 8th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 8th in the regionMost Pro-Market: 8th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 8th in the regionNudest: 10th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 11th in the regionTop
Most Scientifically Advanced: 12th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 14th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 16th in the regionMost Devout: 16th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 20th in the region

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