The Tsardom of Ertillia is a huge, efficient nation, renowned for its parental licensing program, frequent executions, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 724 million Ertillians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Law & Order, Administration, and Industry also on the agenda, while Social Policy and Welfare are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Orlograd. The average income tax rate is 68.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Ertillian economy, worth 124 trillion rubles a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, broadly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Information Technology. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 171,998 rubles, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.7 times as much as the poorest.

It is a silent spring in Ertillia, Leader has declared a weed sticking through a crack in the sidewalk to be the nation's newest green space, children as young as eight can be found working in factories, and citizens wouldn't recognise Leader if they passed one another on the street. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Ertillia's national animal is the eagle, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Ertillia is ranked 32,974^th in the world and 120^th in United Kingdom for Healthiest Citizens, with 7.73 bananas ingested per day.