The Celestial Empire of Eoghania is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by King Euan with an iron fist, and notable for its frequent executions, state-planned economy, and keen interest in outer space. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 24.106 billion Eoghanians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The tiny, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Education, Administration, and Law & Order also on the agenda, while Social Policy and Welfare aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Rehiderah. The average income tax rate is 4.4%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Eoghanian economy, worth a remarkable 6,370 trillion Eoghanian Credits a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized black market in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 264,255 Eoghanian Credits, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

It takes months to get the proper permits for a child's first tricycle, military officers are given medals for disobeying orders, citizens are now allowed to discuss whether King Euan is the greatest ruler ever or simply the greatest ruler of this generation, and homes have been banned from having any more than one wheel. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Eoghania's national animal is the Smaragdusian Cat, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Euanian.

Eoghania is ranked 27,609^th in the world and 1,425^th in Osiris for Healthiest Citizens, with 8.54 bananas ingested per day.