The Republic of Elmyia is a massive, genial nation, remarkable for its compulsory military service, lack of airports, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic, devout population of 2.596 billion Elmyians are known throughout the region for their efficiency and work ethic, as well as their general suspicion of leisure.

The large, moralistic, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Welfare, Environment, and Spirituality. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Beaucester. The average income tax rate is 53.0%.

The Elmyian economy, worth 148 trillion Lire a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Beef-Based Agriculture industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Furniture Restoration, and Trout Farming. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 57,201 Lire, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.7 times as much as the poorest.

Ancient antique swords have had their blades replaced with latex boffer LARP replicas, interviewees for teaching jobs are waterboarded to "reveal undesirable histories", they say that Elmyians made a dessert and called it peace, and the new airport at Mr. Giles' farm is panicking his sheep. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Elmyia's national animal is the octopus, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

Elmyia is ranked 30,347^th in the world and 9^th in Rushmore for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry, scoring 5,163.89 on the Spitz-Pollish Productivity Index.