The Greater Riche of Elfland is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by the Elfqueens with an iron fist, and renowned for its pith helmet sales, free-roaming dinosaurs, and hatred of cheese. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 7.916 billion Elves are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Law & Order, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Féerique. The average income tax rate is 94.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Elvish economy, worth a remarkable 1,319 trillion elfmarks a year, is dominated by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Book Publishing. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 166,738 elfmarks, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The flight attendant who draws the short straw is on "cockpit bucket duty", homes have been banned from having any more than one wheel, people who are too good at riffle shuffling get disappeared by the secret police, and young and brooding teens are welcomed with open arms to the Dogwarts School of Strangeness and Sorcery. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Elfland's national animal is the wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Elvish paganism.

Elfland is ranked 141,874^th in the world and 17^th in The United Islands of the Atlantic for Largest Pizza Delivery Sector, scoring 522.98 on the Pepperoni Propulsion Productivity Index.