The Colony of Eastie is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Oliver with an iron fist, and remarkable for its multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, frequent executions, and hatred of cheese. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 12.482 billion Eastieans are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Administration, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Gulliver. The average income tax rate is 90.2%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Eastiean economy, worth a remarkable 2,508 trillion dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, quite specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Furniture Restoration, Uranium Mining, and Book Publishing. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 200,936 dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.0 times as much as the poorest.

Eastiean watches are often the only thing to survive a disaster intact, shelters struggle to keep up with the endless intake of stray animals, there's a shortage of swinging hot spots as land development grinds to a halt, and artists are pillars of society. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Eastie's national animal is the tigerfish, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to heavy metals seepage into national waterways, and its national religion is Christianity.

Eastie is ranked 115,551^st in the world and 5,289^th in The East Pacific for Most Income Equality, scoring 33.3 on the Marx-Engels Emancipation Scale.