The East of Eastern is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Cliff East with an even hand, and notable for its flagrant waste-dumping, ritual sacrifices, and anti-smoking policies. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 23.042 billion Easternians are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The large, corrupt government prioritizes Defense, although Education, Industry, and Law & Order are also considered important, while Spirituality and Environment aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Easttown. The average income tax rate is 73.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Easternian economy, worth a remarkable 3,553 trillion Easts a year, is led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Woodchip Exports, and Furniture Restoration. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 154,214 Easts, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.5 times as much as the poorest.

Jobs opportunities abound in the Hole Recycling industry, major corporations receive tax breaks for no apparent reason, conductors wield diamond-encrusted batons to fit in with their freshly gilded surroundings, and the government is a proud sponsor of the National Gaming Association. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Eastern's national animal is the panda, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Easternianism.

Eastern is ranked 25,142^nd in the world and 683^rd in The East Pacific for Highest Average Tax Rates, with 73.88 Effective Tax Rate.