by Max Barry

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Most Avoided: 1stMost Corrupt Governments: 1stLargest Mining Sector: 6th
The Exalted Supremacy of
Iron Fist Consumerists
Crush Their Spirits and You Will Control Their Minds
Influence
Truckler
Civil Rights
Unheard Of
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Unheard Of

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

East Borland

Population36.05 billion

CapitalThe Lair
LeaderHis Supreme Eminence
FaithOppression

CurrencySlave
AnimalGila Monster

The Exalted Supremacy of East Borland is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by His Supreme Eminence with an iron fist, and notable for its strictly enforced bedtime, complete lack of public education, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 36.05 billion East Borlandists are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The tiny, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is effectively ruled by the Department of Defense, although Law & Order and Industry are also considered important, while Environment and Social Policy receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Lair. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient East Borlandian economy, worth an astonishing 31,534 trillion Slaves a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Uranium Mining, Retail, and Woodchip Exports. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is a breathtaking 874,753 Slaves, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 6,095,939 per year while the poor average 43,520, a ratio of 140 to 1.

The only Maxxmas gift frontline troops receive from officers is a bullet with the enemy's name on it, tumbleweeds made of litter adorn city streets, ghost regiments exist only on paper, and warning signs caution East Borlandists where they may fall off 'the edge of the world'. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. East Borland's national animal is the Gila Monster, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Oppression.

East Borland is ranked 230,920th in the world and 105th in The Alliance of Dictators for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring -63.72 on the Clooney Contribution Index.

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1%
Most Avoided: 1stMost Corrupt Governments: 1stLargest Mining Sector: 6thMost Secular: 6thLargest Insurance Industry: 7thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 10thFattest Citizens: 10thHighest Disposable Incomes: 10thLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 12thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 13thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 13thLargest Agricultural Sector: 19thHighest Economic Output: 20thHighest Average Incomes: 22ndLargest Retail Industry: 23rdHighest Wealthy Incomes: 25thLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 28thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 31stLowest Overall Tax Burden: 34thMost Ignorant Citizens: 48thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 53rdMost Efficient Economies: 92ndMost Armed: 93rdRudest Citizens: 124thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 179thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 194thLargest Governments: 209thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 250thLowest Crime Rates: 349thMost Primitive: 573rdLargest Populations: 820thMost Stationary: 1,213thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1,227thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 1,340thLargest Black Market: 1,513thTop
5%
Largest Trout Fishing Sector: 4,415thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 7,408thMost Influential: 7,693rdMost Subsidized Industry: 11,275thTop
10%
Most Conservative: 12,576thMost Valuable International Artwork: 12,935thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 20,454th
Top
1%
Most Avoided: 1st in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1st in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Armed: 1st in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 1st in the regionRudest Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 1st in the regionFattest Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 1st in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 1st in the regionMost Secular: 1st in the regionTop
5%
Most Efficient Economies: 2nd in the regionLargest Populations: 2nd in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 2nd in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 2nd in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 2nd in the regionMost Primitive: 2nd in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 2nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 3rd in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 3rd in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 3rd in the regionMost Stationary: 3rd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 3rd in the regionLargest Governments: 4th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 4th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 4th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 5th in the regionTop
10%
Largest Trout Fishing Sector: 6th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 7th in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 7th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 9th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, warning signs caution East Borlandists where they may fall off 'the edge of the world'.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, ghost regiments exist only on paper.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, tumbleweeds made of litter adorn city streets.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, the only Maxxmas gift frontline troops receive from officers is a bullet with the enemy's name on it.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, preservative-laden East Borlandian cheeses will be as edible when archaeologists dig them up next millennium.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, reports of arson have doubled since the introduction of a privatised fire protection service.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, diplomats in East Borland are furious at constant police surveillance.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, His Supreme Eminence's latest speech included a bizarre reference to MaxWow incontinence pads being 50% more absorbent than the next leading brand.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, skateboarding is punishable by heavy fines.
  • : Following new legislation in East Borland, motorists' locations are constantly tracked by intelligence and law enforcement agencies.

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