The Federation of Eas Knine is a massive, safe nation, renowned for its rum-swilling pirates, punitive income tax rates, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate population of 2.372 billion Eas Knineans are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Zeli Hibana. The average income tax rate is 94.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Eas Kninean economy, worth 271 trillion bitcoins a year, is quite specialized and led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Tourism and Information Technology. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 114,357 bitcoins, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Eas Knine has one of the largest offshore wind farms in the world, no one believes anything until it has been strenuously tested and peer-reviewed, children aren't allowed to chew their pencils until they get home from school, and chalkboards are replaced with billboards in the classroom. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Eas Knine's national animal is the dove, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Eas Knine is ranked 11,830^th in the world and 35^th in Wintreath for Healthiest Citizens, with 13.69 bananas ingested per day.