by Max Barry

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Rudest Citizens: 234thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 256thMost Efficient Economies: 415th
The Mountain Song of
Corporate Bordello
Listen for the Alpenhorn
Influence
Squire
Region
Civil Rights
Excellent
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Superb

Overview Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Dwarf

Population5.517 billion

CapitalDwarf Fortress
LeaderFáfnir Longbeard
FaithCult of the Mountain Lord

Currencyore
AnimalMusk Ox

The Mountain Song of Dwarf is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Fáfnir Longbeard with a fair hand, and notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, free-roaming dinosaurs, and smutty television. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic, cheerful population of 5.517 billion Dwarves are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The medium-sized, corrupt, pro-business, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Dwarf Fortress. The average income tax rate is 94.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Dwarfen economy, worth a remarkable 1,681 trillion ores a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Arms Manufacturing, and Retail. Average income is an amazing 304,702 ores, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 2,730,089 per year while the poor average 4,379, a ratio of 623 to 1.

Robotic spouses prove to be just as imperfect as flesh and blood ones, atheistic refugees haven't got a prayer of being granted asylum, baiting is a national sport, and recognizing the Dwarfen flag qualifies you for citizenship. Crime is totally unknown. Dwarf's national animal is the Musk Ox, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Cult of the Mountain Lord.

Dwarf is ranked 2,705th in the world and 5th in Middle Earth for Most Inclusive, scoring 295.05 on the Mandela-Wollstonecraft Non-Discrimination Index.

Top
1%
Rudest Citizens: 234thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 256thMost Efficient Economies: 415thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 687thLargest Agricultural Sector: 851stLargest Publishing Industry: 904thMost Scientifically Advanced: 1,150thMost Subsidized Industry: 1,222ndSmartest Citizens: 1,281stMost Cultured: 1,393rdMost Cheerful Citizens: 1,576thLargest Retail Industry: 1,592ndLargest Mining Sector: 1,816thHighest Average Incomes: 2,026thHighest Food Quality: 2,157thLargest Governments: 2,282ndTop
5%
Most Developed: 2,472ndMost Inclusive: 2,705thLargest Information Technology Sector: 2,922ndMost Secular: 4,850thMost Rebellious Youth: 4,881stLargest Manufacturing Sector: 5,235thHighest Average Tax Rates: 5,698thMost Patriotic: 5,828thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 6,307thLongest Average Lifespans: 6,793rdMost Advanced Public Education: 6,897thHealthiest Citizens: 7,226thLargest Welfare Programs: 7,403rdLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 7,404thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 7,958thLowest Crime Rates: 8,006thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 8,300thNicest Citizens: 9,418thHighest Economic Output: 10,541stLargest Soda Pop Sector: 11,266thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 11,553rdTop
10%
Most Advanced Defense Forces: 12,847thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 12,876thMost Corrupt Governments: 13,056thMost Pro-Market: 13,968thMost Valuable International Artwork: 15,986thHighest Drug Use: 17,074thMost Compassionate Citizens: 19,879thMost Advanced Public Transport: 21,705th
Top
1%
Highest Wealthy Incomes: 1st in the regionRudest Citizens: 1st in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 1st in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 1st in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 1st in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 1st in the regionTop
5%
Most Patriotic: 2nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 2nd in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 2nd in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 2nd in the regionHighest Drug Use: 2nd in the regionSmartest Citizens: 2nd in the regionLargest Governments: 2nd in the regionMost Cultured: 3rd in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 3rd in the regionMost Secular: 3rd in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 3rd in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 3rd in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 3rd in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 3rd in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 3rd in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 3rd in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 4th in the regionMost Pro-Market: 4th in the regionHighest Food Quality: 4th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 4th in the regionMost Inclusive: 5th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 5th in the regionMost Developed: 5th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 5th in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 6th in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 6th in the regionNicest Citizens: 6th in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 7th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 7th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 7th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 7th in the regionTop
10%
Most Popular Tourist Destinations: 8th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 8th in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 8th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 9th in the regionMost Politically Free: 10th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 11th in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 11th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Dwarf, recognizing the Dwarfen flag qualifies you for citizenship.
  • : Following new legislation in Dwarf, baiting is a national sport.
  • : Following new legislation in Dwarf, atheistic refugees haven't got a prayer of being granted asylum.
  • : Following new legislation in Dwarf, robotic spouses prove to be just as imperfect as flesh and blood ones.
  • : Following new legislation in Dwarf, if a tree falls in the forest and nobody is there to hear it... Dwarfen satellites can detect it.
  • : Dwarf was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Highest Food Quality and the Top 5% for Most Popular Tourist Destinations and Most Patriotic.
  • : Following new legislation in Dwarf, paper and ink publications are subsidised by the government to keep them in the black.
  • : Following new legislation in Dwarf, all the playground's a stage for Dwarfen schoolchildren.
  • : Following new legislation in Dwarf, the nation has always been at war with Bigtopia.
  • : Following new legislation in Dwarf, no one believes anything until it has been strenuously tested and peer-reviewed.

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