The Mystical Isles of Dutchyland is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Dutchy with a fair hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, infamous sell-swords, and absence of drug laws. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 20.439 billion Dutchylandians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The enormous, liberal, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Dutchopolis. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Dutchylandian economy, worth a remarkable 6,762 trillion Dutchers a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Tourism and Information Technology. Average income is an amazing 330,838 Dutchers, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

It is mandatory to learn evolution in schools, all recreational drugs are legal, cops shout apologies with every swing of their baton, and teachers are dying as they attempt to read 500 word essays without pausing for breath. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Dutchyland's national animal is the Dutchay, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Dutchyland is ranked 1,504^th in the world and 77^th in The North Pacific for Most Advanced Law Enforcement, scoring 16,209.4 on the Orwell Orderliness Index.