by Max Barry

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Most Ignorant Citizens: 530th Most Armed: 658th Largest Soda Pop Sector: 767th
The Drunken Tyranny of
Father Knows Best State
Brah what's a Diploma?
Egglin Gaylord
Civil Rights
Political Freedom
Unheard Of

Overview Factbook Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards


Population1.855 billion

CapitalBum City
LeaderEgglin Gaylord

CurrencyBird Droppings
AnimalDrunk Pig

The Drunken Tyranny of Drunkerland is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by Egglin Gaylord with an iron fist, and notable for its public floggings, zero percent divorce rate, and compulsory gun ownership. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 1.855 billion Bums are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government prioritizes Defense, although Administration, Spirituality, and Industry are also considered important, while Welfare and Public Transport aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Bum City. The average income tax rate is 56.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Drunkerlandian economy, worth 289 trillion Bird Droppings a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, fairly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Soda Sales, Retail, and Uranium Mining. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an impressive 156,130 Bird Droppings, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.0 times as much as the poorest.

It's considered a valid legal defence to say "a demon made me do it", police wait behind troop deployments in order to shoot deserters, the nation leads The Glorious Nations of Iwaku in per capita stalking, and piracy is the nation's most popular pastime. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Drunkerland's national animal is the Drunk Pig, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Communism.

Drunkerland is ranked 37,271st in the world and 89th in The Glorious Nations of Iwaku for Most Influential, scoring 503 on the Soft Power Disbursement Rating.

Most Ignorant Citizens: 530thMost Armed: 658thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 767thHighest Crime Rates: 974thFattest Citizens: 1,426thNudest: 1,533rdTop
Most Devout: 1,798thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1,846thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 2,113thMost Avoided: 2,333rdLargest Manufacturing Sector: 2,387thLargest Black Market: 3,061stLargest Mining Sector: 3,511thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 3,582ndMost Corrupt Governments: 3,668thMost Rebellious Youth: 5,801stLargest Retail Industry: 6,831stMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 7,418thHighest Poor Incomes: 7,818thTop
Most Primitive: 9,127thHighest Average Incomes: 11,211thMost Subsidized Industry: 12,494thHighest Drug Use: 12,797th
Largest Soda Pop Sector: 4th in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 5th in the regionNudest: 7th in the regionFattest Citizens: 7th in the regionMost Armed: 7th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 8th in the regionMost Avoided: 8th in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 9th in the regionMost Devout: 10th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 11th in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 12th in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 14th in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 16th in the regionTop
Largest Black Market: 18th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 21st in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 22nd in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 23rd in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 23rd in the regionMost Primitive: 30th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 33rd in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Drunkerland was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Nudest.
  • : Following new legislation in Drunkerland, piracy is the nation's most popular pastime.
  • : Following new legislation in Drunkerland, the nation leads The Glorious Nations of Iwaku in per capita stalking.
  • : Drunkerland was reclassified from "Iron Fist Consumerists" to "Father Knows Best State".
  • : Following new legislation in Drunkerland, police wait behind troop deployments in order to shoot deserters.
  • : Following new legislation in Drunkerland, it's considered a valid legal defence to say "a demon made me do it".
  • : Drunkerland altered its national flag.
  • : Drunkerland was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Highest Poor Incomes and the Top 10% for Most Authoritarian.
  • : Following new legislation in Drunkerland, the military is recruiting war criminals to join its weapons research teams.
  • : Following new legislation in Drunkerland, no-one can foil the ambitions of Big Aluminium.


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