by Max Barry

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Most Ignorant Citizens: 13,412thMost Authoritarian: 25,484th
The Republic of
Iron Fist Consumerists
Not again
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview Dispatches Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Dont put me in

Population3.316 billion


The Republic of Dont put me in is a massive, orderly nation, renowned for its irreverence towards religion, suspicion of poets, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 3.316 billion Dont put me inians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Healthcare. The average income tax rate is 23.4%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The Dont put me inian economy, worth 122 trillion dollars a year, is dominated by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Cheese Exports, Automobile Manufacturing, and Gambling. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 36,913 dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.8 times as much as the poorest.

Schoolchildren learn basic numeracy by counting off their push-ups, town welcome signs list corporate sponsors, eight-year-olds with lemonade stands have been known to be locked up on charges of embezzlement, and human sacrifice to the metaphorical altar of Mammon ensures national prosperity. Crime, especially youth-related, is relatively low, thanks to a well-funded police force. Dont put me in's national animal is the tiger, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Dont put me in is ranked 140,651st in the world and 1st in The Toaster for Largest Retail Industry, scoring 658.87 on the Shrinkwrap Consignment Productivity Index.

Most Ignorant Citizens: 13,412thMost Authoritarian: 25,484th

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