The Holy Empire of Dogbreathistan is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by A Labrador Retriver with an even hand, and renowned for its ritual sacrifices, otherworldly petting zoo, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 29.536 billion Dogbreathistanians are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The minute, pro-business government, or what there is of one, is solely concerned with Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Couch. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Dogbreathistanian economy, worth a remarkable 9,978 trillion Dog Poops a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Gambling, and Soda Sales. Average income is an amazing 337,846 Dog Poops, but there is a vast disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 2,306,318 per year while the poor average 17,928, a ratio of 128 to 1.

The sound of office water cooler chatter has been replaced by the whirring of computer cooling fans, the military is plagued with unethical researchers, soldiers are taught to throw their guns at their enemies once the bullets have run out, and the government response to disaster victims starving for bread is "let them eat stale cake". Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, probably because of the absence of a police force. Dogbreathistan's national animal is the Dog, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Dogbreathistan is ranked 24,987^th in the world and 15^th in Texas for Most Secular, with 44.02 Atheism Rate.