The Holy Empire of Dogbreathistan is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by A Labrador Retriver with an even hand, and notable for its unlimited-speed roads, compulsory military service, and free-roaming dinosaurs. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 23.437 billion Dogbreathistanians are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The minute government, or what there is of one, is solely concerned with Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Couch. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Dogbreathistanian economy, worth a remarkable 7,839 trillion Dog Poops a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Gambling, and Soda Sales. Average income is an amazing 334,508 Dog Poops, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 1,861,783 per year while the poor average 30,066, a ratio of 61.9 to 1.

Community-designed sword prostheses are becoming dangerously common, getting an autograph has become harder than ever, the army's use of chemical weapons leaves a bad taste in the mouth, and the Dogbreathistanian football team for the Maxxmas ceasefire consists only of Intelligence Corps personnel. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, probably because of the absence of a police force. Dogbreathistan's national animal is the Dog, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Dogbreathistan is ranked 232,823^rd in the world and 183^rd in Texas for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring -47.33 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.