by Max Barry

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Most Ignorant Citizens: 87th Most Compassionate Citizens: 127th Nicest Citizens: 157th
The Holy Empire of
Psychotic Dictatorship
Everybody's mortal but me
Regional Influence
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview People Government Economy Rank Trend

The Holy Empire of Devoted Snails is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Leader with an iron fist, and remarkable for its strictly enforced bedtime, lack of airports, and hatred of cheese. The compassionate, cynical, cheerful, devout population of 30.607 billion Devoted Snailsians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The minute, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government, or what there is of one, is primarily concerned with Law & Order, with Environment, Education, and Welfare also on the agenda, while Defense isn't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Devoted Snails City. Income tax is unheard of.

The large but sluggish Devoted Snailsian economy, worth 609 trillion Godly Shells a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is mostly comprised of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, although the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 19,903 Godly Shells, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The police have reaffirmed their tough stance on drugs, the words 'private' and 'enterprise' must never appear in the same sentence, poets and writers are regularly rounded up and shot for entertainment, and retirement homes are often fitted with luxurious suites. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Devoted Snails's national animal is the Dove, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Blind Devotion.

Devoted Snails is ranked 150,192nd in the world and 4,438th in Balder for Healthiest Citizens, with 0.36 Bananas Ingested Per Day.

Most Ignorant Citizens: 87thMost Compassionate Citizens: 127thNicest Citizens: 157thMost Pacifist: 198thMost Primitive: 280thBest Weather: 325thLargest Populations: 395thMost Devout: 492ndLowest Overall Tax Burden: 517thMost Cheerful Citizens: 555thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 765thMost Beautiful Environments: 873rdTop
Lowest Crime Rates: 1,696thMost Authoritarian: 2,457thLongest Average Lifespans: 2,915thMost Extreme: 6,669thMost Stationary: 7,368thTop
Most Corrupt Governments: 9,707thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 10,271st
Most Compassionate Citizens: 1st in the regionNicest Citizens: 2nd in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 3rd in the regionMost Pacifist: 3rd in the regionLargest Populations: 4th in the regionMost Primitive: 7th in the regionBest Weather: 7th in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 11th in the regionMost Devout: 14th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 16th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 18th in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 19th in the regionTop
Most Authoritarian: 50th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 72nd in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 80th in the regionMost Stationary: 90th in the regionMost Extreme: 106th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity: