Most Ignorant Citizens: 65th Most Compassionate Citizens: 105th Nicest Citizens: 132nd
The Holy Empire of
Psychotic Dictatorship
Everybody's mortal but me
Regional Influence
Sprat
Region
Civil Rights
Few
Economy
Struggling
Political Freedom
Outlawed

Overview People Government Economy Rank Trend

The Holy Empire of Devoted Snails is a gargantuan, genial nation, ruled by Leader with an iron fist, and notable for its anti-smoking policies, national health service, and frequent executions. The compassionate, cynical, cheerful, devout population of 29.52 billion Devoted Snailsians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The minute, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government, or what there is of one, is primarily concerned with Law & Order, with Environment, Education, and Spirituality also on the agenda, while Defense isn't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Devoted Snails City. Income tax is unheard of.

The large but sluggish Devoted Snailsian economy, worth 587 trillion Godly Shells a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is mostly comprised of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, although the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 19,903 Godly Shells, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The police have reaffirmed their tough stance on drugs, the words 'private' and 'enterprise' must never appear in the same sentence, poets and writers are regularly rounded up and shot for entertainment, and retirement homes are often fitted with luxurious suites. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Devoted Snails's national animal is the Dove, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Blind Devotion.

Devoted Snails is ranked 205th in the world and 4th in Balder for Most Primitive, scoring 251.8 on the Scary Big Number Scale.

Top
1%
Most Ignorant Citizens: 65thMost Compassionate Citizens: 105thNicest Citizens: 132ndMost Pacifist: 179thMost Primitive: 205thBest Weather: 268thLargest Populations: 413thMost Devout: 414thMost Cheerful Citizens: 537thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 547thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 656thMost Beautiful Environments: 747thTop
5%
Lowest Crime Rates: 1,678thMost Authoritarian: 2,484thLongest Average Lifespans: 2,499thMost Extreme: 6,381stTop
10%
Most Stationary: 8,795thMost Corrupt Governments: 10,018thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 10,108th
Top
1%
Nicest Citizens: 2nd in the regionMost Compassionate Citizens: 2nd in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 2nd in the regionMost Primitive: 4th in the regionMost Pacifist: 4th in the regionBest Weather: 7th in the regionLargest Populations: 7th in the regionMost Devout: 10th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 16th in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 16th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 18th in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 21st in the regionMost Authoritarian: 39th in the regionTop
5%
Longest Average Lifespans: 66th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 76th in the regionMost Extreme: 88th in the regionMost Stationary: 104th in the regionTop
10%
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 430th in the region

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by Max Barry

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