by Max Barry

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Most Ignorant Citizens: 81st Most Compassionate Citizens: 114th Nicest Citizens: 142nd
The Holy Empire of
Psychotic Dictatorship
Everybody's mortal but me
Regional Influence
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview People Government Economy Rank Trend

The Holy Empire of Devoted Snails is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Leader with an iron fist, and renowned for its deadly medical pandemics, lack of airports, and hatred of cheese. The compassionate, cynical, cheerful, devout population of 30.09 billion Devoted Snailsians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The minute, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government, or what there is of one, is primarily concerned with Law & Order, with Environment, Education, and Spirituality also on the agenda, while Defense isn't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Devoted Snails City. Income tax is unheard of.

The large but sluggish Devoted Snailsian economy, worth 598 trillion Godly Shells a year, is driven almost entirely by government activity, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is mostly comprised of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, although the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 19,903 Godly Shells, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The police have reaffirmed their tough stance on drugs, the words 'private' and 'enterprise' must never appear in the same sentence, poets and writers are regularly rounded up and shot for entertainment, and retirement homes are often fitted with luxurious suites. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to the all-pervasive police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Devoted Snails's national animal is the Dove, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Blind Devotion.

Devoted Snails is ranked 178,911th in the world and 5,371st in Balder for Most Avoided, scoring 0.24 on the Kardashian Reflex Score.

Most Ignorant Citizens: 81stMost Compassionate Citizens: 114thNicest Citizens: 142ndMost Pacifist: 189thMost Primitive: 253rdBest Weather: 297thLargest Populations: 400thMost Devout: 453rdLowest Overall Tax Burden: 531stMost Cheerful Citizens: 551stMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 720thMost Beautiful Environments: 822ndLowest Crime Rates: 1,687thTop
Longest Average Lifespans: 2,738thMost Authoritarian: 3,069thMost Extreme: 7,376thMost Stationary: 7,866thTop
Most Corrupt Governments: 10,613thMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 11,493rd
Most Compassionate Citizens: 1st in the regionMost Ignorant Citizens: 3rd in the regionNicest Citizens: 3rd in the regionMost Pacifist: 4th in the regionLargest Populations: 5th in the regionBest Weather: 7th in the regionMost Primitive: 9th in the regionMost Devout: 13th in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 15th in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 15th in the regionMost Cheerful Citizens: 21st in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 21st in the regionTop
Lowest Crime Rates: 69th in the regionLongest Average Lifespans: 76th in the regionMost Authoritarian: 85th in the regionMost Stationary: 96th in the regionMost Extreme: 155th in the regionTop
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 454th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 491st in the region

National Happenings

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