The Poets Light But Lamps of Dar es Saalam is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Saint Catherine of Siena with an even hand, and renowned for its anti-smoking policies, complete lack of prisons, and absence of drug laws. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless, devout population of 19.057 billion Lamis have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Dodoma. The average income tax rate is 90.7%.

The frighteningly efficient Dar es Saalamian economy, worth a remarkable 6,036 trillion Drachmas a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, Retail, and Information Technology. Average income is an amazing 316,739 Drachmas, with the richest citizens earning 5.2 times as much as the poorest.

Military units are often seen arguing over which one is truly favored by the gods, Dar es Saalamian actors literally work from cradle to grave, politicians preface their speeches with a declaration that any resemblance to speeches given by individuals living or dead is purely coincidental, and a cat may look at a king and a dude can look at an ass. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Dar es Saalam's national animal is the Vampire Orca Monster Thing, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Catholicism.

Dar es Saalam is ranked 2,790^th in the world and 98^th in The North Pacific for Most Armed, with 13.3 weapons per person.