by Max Barry

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Largest Soda Pop Sector: 550thHighest Crime Rates: 1,082ndMost World Assembly Endorsements: 1,287th
The Devastation of
Hit it With a Rock
Civil Rights
Political Freedom
World Benchmark

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Nuke Control Cards

Cro Magnon

Population16.696 billion

CapitalThe Fire Pit
Leadera council of Dons

Currencyshiny stone
AnimalWoolly Mammoth

The Devastation of Cro Magnon is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by a council of Dons with a fair hand, and notable for its daily referendums, flagrant waste-dumping, and complete lack of public education. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 16.696 billion Cro Mags live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The minute, liberal, outspoken government, or what there is of one, is solely concerned with Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Fire Pit. The average income tax rate is 3.5%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming Cro Magnon economy, worth a remarkable 1,226 trillion shiny stones a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is led by the Soda Sales industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Gambling, and Uranium Mining. Average income is 73,430 shiny stones, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.2 times as much as the poorest.

The country's famous rainforests are being bulldozed by the mining industry, closed universities are currently being converted into MacDonald's restaurants, a survey of the nation's rivers and children has shown that pesticide levels are at an all-time regional high, and Humongo-Mart's Beef 'n Woolly Mammoth Lasagne is a hit. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Cro Magnon's national animal is the Woolly Mammoth, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Darkesianism.

Cro Magnon is ranked 3,053rd in the world and 50th in the West Pacific for Most Rebellious Youth, scoring 34 on the Stark-Dean Displacement Index.

Largest Soda Pop Sector: 550thHighest Crime Rates: 1,082ndMost World Assembly Endorsements: 1,287thMost Influential: 1,385thHighest Drug Use: 1,699thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 1,937thMost Avoided: 2,152ndFattest Citizens: 2,180thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 2,366thTop
Most Armed: 2,828thMost Rebellious Youth: 3,053rdLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 4,062ndLargest Gambling Industry: 4,251stMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 5,073rdLargest Retail Industry: 6,751stRudest Citizens: 7,602ndMost Valuable International Artwork: 9,388thNudest: 11,829thTop
Largest Mining Sector: 13,848thHighest Disposable Incomes: 14,160thLargest Populations: 14,540thHighest Economic Output: 15,392ndMost Extensive Civil Rights: 17,592ndLargest Black Market: 17,628thMost Politically Free: 23,369th
Most Influential: 11th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 11th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 12th in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 17th in the regionHighest Drug Use: 17th in the regionFattest Citizens: 36th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 36th in the regionMost Avoided: 40th in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 41st in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 50th in the regionMost Armed: 56th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 66th in the regionTop
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 83rd in the regionMost Extensive Civil Rights: 101st in the regionLargest Populations: 119th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 130th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 171st in the regionNudest: 181st in the regionRudest Citizens: 193rd in the regionMost Politically Free: 202nd in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 212th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 224th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 233rd in the regionLargest Black Market: 237th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 331st in the regionTop
Most Stationary: 431st in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:


World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 156 » Kisovec, Wickedly evil people, Sensorland, DiscGolfLand, Psikuta, Atheist States of Philippines, Arnic, Condonohia, Kittenlicious, Twisted Duality, New Belia, Crazy Waters, Constantinopolisia, Fallgriffin, Greg Tucker, Pandaland II, Liberillia, Mirchusko, Comia Noracon, Leukogeras, Probablynotverygoodistan, Archonina, Sindria, Greynne, Dreamers for Hope, Glorious Existence, The Rega, Albyion Kingdom, Svanland, Westwind, Nedtherland, Tropical Isles, Marina Nova, Granducato Toscana, Desmosthenes and Burke, Oronia, Matism, Great Sheriffdom, Maria, Thyrall, New Democratic Republic of Russia, Lynier, Triestine, Bodusse, Mathematania, The North American Assembly, Winter Aura, Lanaroce, The United Tribes of Bantai, Imperial Eascalsh Ohavillbell, and 106 others.Common Good, Shaktirajya, Ingentis Novus, The Undivided, Atopias, BoxcarJim, Ellcrys, Robbinston, Ferroia, Gryphonian Alliance, Meedvheyt, Q The Almighty, The Isle of Burgrass, Kiensu, Amanohara, Futuo, Antahbrantahstan, IndyCar Racing, Moriari, Holmani, Mediobogdum, Fujai, Anuubis, Volkason, Fallen Iron Duke, Willow Gate, East Swedesia, Bucals Kagotoaion, El Facil, Grand Republic of the Sun, Vlobbania, San Diego Islands, Nas Crustium, Hamburg Neo, Ocheon, Sultanat of Turkistan, Gottlands, Professor thomas, India and Bangladesh, Valocke, Aldesport, BIteland, Weyrland, Theicor, Orson Welles, Plarland Amex, Wild Wild 100s, Iglot, Galaxy Meows, Dilber, Giovanniland, Recuecn, Fuentana, New Moriya, Forcaforta, Smedlandia, Podium, Bhang Bhang Duc, Zuriath, Muad-Dib, Isle Royale, Mackieron, The United Republic of Westend, Archipool, Eastern Bahia, Wellington Bingbong, Wild lands of Tribe, New Cacknia, Recenesia, Arifiyyah, New Caterse, Archinos, Ostrogothaland, Cryland, Vaporiaz, New Will Land, One Nation under Rob, Rowdy, Dowaesk, Dictator s, Av Libertas Vindex, Vicerante, The Anti-Social Socialists, Dei et Hominis, Parisitan, Lothundy, Attanseia, Burakis, Santos-Dominius, Kraboch, Rovkyzvat, Blue Bubble, Larxia, Draggy, Papercuts and Skittles, Ecornia, Corbeil, Overthinkers, Mikano, Lodus Lake, Morachia, Japonic Islands, Pandaland III, Armed pacifists, Kody United, and Lodiberdade.

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