by Max Barry

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Largest Soda Pop Sector: 528th Highest Crime Rates: 924th Most World Assembly Endorsements: 1,118th
The Devastation of
Hit it With a Rock
Civil Rights
World Benchmark
Political Freedom

Overview Factbook Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Cro Magnon

Population11.605 billion

CapitalThe Fire Pit
Leadera council of Dons

Currencyshiny stone
AnimalWoolly Mammoth

The Devastation of Cro Magnon is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by a council of Dons with a fair hand, and notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, rampant corporate plagiarism, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 11.605 billion Cro Mags live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

There is no government in the normal sense of the word; however, a small group of community-minded, liberal, pro-business, outspoken individuals is solely concerned with Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Fire Pit. Income tax is unheard of.

The powerhouse Cro Magnon economy, worth a remarkable 1,106 trillion shiny stones a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is fairly diversified and led by the Soda Sales industry, with significant contributions from Gambling, Retail, and Pizza Delivery. Average income is 95,341 shiny stones, with the richest citizens earning 9.1 times as much as the poorest.

The country's famous rainforests are being bulldozed by the mining industry, closed universities are currently being converted into MacDonald's restaurants, a survey of the nation's rivers and children has shown that pesticide levels are at an all-time regional high, and Humongo-Mart's Beef 'n Woolly Mammoth Lasagne is a hit. Crime, especially youth-related, is all-pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Cro Magnon's national animal is the Woolly Mammoth, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Darkesianism.

Cro Magnon is ranked 68,185th in the world and 3,585th in the West Pacific for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 50.5 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.

Largest Soda Pop Sector: 528thHighest Crime Rates: 924thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 1,118thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1,145thMost Armed: 1,317thTop
Fattest Citizens: 1,854thLargest Gambling Industry: 1,876thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 2,066thHighest Drug Use: 2,425thMost Avoided: 2,851stMost Influential: 3,066thMost Rebellious Youth: 3,209thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 3,363rdMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 3,600thRudest Citizens: 4,227thLargest Retail Industry: 5,109thMost Politically Free: 6,684thHighest Disposable Incomes: 7,429thLargest Mining Sector: 7,733rdMost Pro-Market: 8,167thMost Extensive Civil Rights: 8,390thTop
Nudest: 11,779thMost Extreme: 12,426thHighest Economic Output: 12,572ndLargest Populations: 16,785th
Largest Soda Pop Sector: 10th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 10th in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 14th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 24th in the regionMost Armed: 27th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 31st in the regionFattest Citizens: 34th in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 37th in the regionHighest Drug Use: 49th in the regionMost Avoided: 50th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 61st in the regionMost Influential: 65th in the regionMost Rebellious Youth: 65th in the regionTop
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 75th in the regionMost Politically Free: 96th in the regionRudest Citizens: 123rd in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 131st in the regionLargest Populations: 160th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 170th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 173rd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 200th in the regionMost Pro-Market: 245th in the regionNudest: 264th in the regionMost Extensive Civil Rights: 326th in the regionTop
Largest Black Market: 397th in the regionMost Extreme: 511th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:


World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 145 » Bhang Bhang Duc, The Holy Principality of Saint Mark, Alchera, Westwind, Yy4u, Pandaland III, Bran Astor, Dalimbar, Tunapocalypse, Glorious Existence, The 9 Stars, Zogradia, Fujai, Shaktirajya, Avadon, Allwarts, Pandaland II, Oometz, Mathematania, Greynne, The Free States of Gotham, New Belia, Keerim Foundation, Oronia, The Impregnable Theodosioupolis, The Father-Land, Montreal-Quebec, Acropylae, NoHiceLand, Fallgriffin, Numpties, New Democratic Republic of Russia, Xiuhtezcatl, Kisovec, Champaign, Kittenlicious, Mirchusko, Liberland7, UNLL, Condonohia, Crazy Waters, Archonina, DiscGolfLand, Twisted Duality, Liberillia, Win Mints, WyEast, Divina Patriae, Comia Noracon, Ioways, and 95 others.Thyrall, Greg Tucker, Andyr, Triestine, Torkvale, Podium, Wyndward, United Adaikes, Radnia, Leukogeras, The United Republic of Westend, Sindria, Common Good, Lynier, Froghaven, Blue Ocean on Beach, Rogue Foundation Security Division Omega, Volpi Apostati, Cyno, Barcocoland, Kyeongsang, Bron Zortin, Xandar Isles, Aldesport, Merbija, The Undivided, The Anclave, Carinthea, The Union of American Territories, The Isle of Burgrass, Velandomew, Mackerels and Puppers, Suniterian, Matism, Robbinston, Meedvheyt, Coung Komands, Nevafornia, The Anti-Social Socialists, Psikuta, Vugaland, Dreamers for Hope, Nedtherland, Shaqolandia, Cazia Minor, Winterwind Hinterland, Desmosthenes and Burke, E002, Shining Potato Land, Memey Land, Dilber, Svanland, Rivello, Escapitania, Empire of Spartacus, Atopias, Vicinity Isles, Mankerson, Aravik, Former Bulgarian Cities, Luminaros, Mercanta, Land of Lahiti, Great Sheriffdom, Tunnbridge, Northern East Asia, Fletcheria, Ferroia, West-Fryslan, El Facil, Ellcrys, Royal Institution-Imperial Academy, Vseslovanskij Soyuz, Grandi Fiori, Galaxy, ORMOC CITY, LightBane, New Velka, Molodava, Giantino, Cerulean Prime, Orden Fres, Ljosalfaryz, Atheisma, Fourth European Reich, Ter Voland, Aja Nabha Varsha, Troodan, New New Avignon, Halvard, Flemitopia, Ghouldovka, Cryland, Omaze, and Ilmecith.

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