The Socialist Democracy of Crilland is a massive, genial nation, ruled by Praeses Joebama with an even hand, and remarkable for its keen interest in outer space, unlimited-speed roads, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate population of 4.479 billion Crillandians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Byses. The average income tax rate is 84.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Crillandian economy, worth 575 trillion Green Paper Rectangles a year, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 128,598 Green Paper Rectangles, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.4 times as much as the poorest.

Drill sergeants yell in the ears of bespectacled nerds in cybermilitary "reboot camps", Praeses Joebama has been seen stealthily slicing fifths off bread loaves, doctors prescribe medicines but they rarely dispense hope or compassion, and reporters who negatively comment on politicians' haircuts are cut from the news. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Crilland's national animal is the Bingus, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Money.

Crilland is ranked 87,460^th in the world and 3,947^th in The North Pacific for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry, scoring 2,926.88 on the Spitz-Pollish Productivity Index.