The Lord Damn Pink Democracy of Conklandi is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by The Great Conk with an even hand, and notable for its keen interest in outer space, daily referendums, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 4.092 billion Conklandians enjoy extensive civil freedoms, particularly in social issues, while business tends to be more regulated.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Conklandi City. The average income tax rate is 94.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Conklandian economy, worth 767 trillion Cowries a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 187,585 Cowries, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Corporate lawyers are switching careers to the more lucrative field of green politics, artists are renowned for their ability to make art pieces out of thin air, EpiPen sales have skyrocketed, and the tax agency is feared more than serial killers and terrorists. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Conklandi's national animal is the Vampire Seal, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

Conklandi is ranked 301,376^th in the world and 11,781^st in The North Pacific for Fattest Citizens, with 3.55 Obesity Rate.