by Max Barry

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Largest Insurance Industry: 3rd Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 3rd Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 4th
The Popsicle Pete Nation of
Iron Fist Consumerists
NONE OF YOU ARE SAFE!
Influence
Shoeshiner
Civil Rights
Unheard Of
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Outlawed

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend

Clench

Population26.062 billion

CapitalJoseph City
LeaderJoseph
FaithJosephism

Currencymoney
Animalviper

The Popsicle Pete Nation of Clench is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Joseph with an iron fist, and notable for its sprawling nuclear power plants, anti-smoking policies, and triple-decker prams. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 26.062 billion follower of Josephs are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Industry and Healthcare also on the agenda, while Social Policy and Environment are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Joseph City. The average income tax rate is 98.6%.

The frighteningly efficient Josephic economy, worth an astonishing 26,579 trillion monies a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. Average income is a breathtaking 1,019,849 monies, with the richest citizens earning 5.5 times as much as the poorest.

Strange looking men with big red noses are found hiding behind bushes and inside dustbins, police drones follow every suspected Peeping Tom, school uniforms are compulsory, and the police use sound cannons and mortars to deal with loud parties. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Clench's national animal is the viper, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Josephism.

Clench is ranked 3rd in the world and 1st in the Rejected Realms for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring 63,786.3 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.

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1%
Largest Insurance Industry: 3rdLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 3rdLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 4thHighest Average Incomes: 5thLargest Mining Sector: 6thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 7thHighest Economic Output: 16thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 19thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 20thLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 26thHighest Poor Incomes: 34thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 35thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 37thLargest Black Market: 42ndLargest Cheese Export Sector: 49thMost Subsidized Industry: 69thLargest Agricultural Sector: 69thMost Corrupt Governments: 90thLargest Governments: 104thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 137thMost Avoided: 142ndLargest Soda Pop Sector: 147thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 186thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 197thLargest Retail Industry: 218thFattest Citizens: 234thLowest Crime Rates: 265thMost Advanced Public Transport: 578thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 807thMost Scientifically Advanced: 1,201stHighest Average Tax Rates: 1,582ndTop
5%
Largest Populations: 1,946thMost Efficient Economies: 2,051stLargest Information Technology Sector: 3,268thRudest Citizens: 3,864thMost Conservative: 6,466thTop
10%
Most Devout: 9,846thMost Stationary: 13,199thLargest Publishing Industry: 13,504thMost Advanced Public Education: 13,635thMost Extreme: 15,329thMost Authoritarian: 15,488thSmartest Citizens: 16,597th
Top
1%
Largest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 1st in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 2nd in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 2nd in the regionLargest Governments: 3rd in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 3rd in the regionLargest Black Market: 3rd in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 4th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 4th in the regionMost Avoided: 4th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 5th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 6th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 7th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 8th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 8th in the regionFattest Citizens: 9th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 14th in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 18th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 24th in the regionLargest Populations: 32nd in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 32nd in the regionTop
5%
Most Efficient Economies: 46th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 59th in the regionRudest Citizens: 99th in the regionMost Stationary: 129th in the regionMost Conservative: 165th in the regionMost Devout: 190th in the regionTop
10%
Largest Publishing Industry: 227th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 265th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 301st in the regionMost Extreme: 316th in the regionMost Authoritarian: 344th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Clench was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Scientifically Advanced.
  • : Clench was cleansed by a Level 1 Strike Force Tactical Zombie Elimination Squad from The Dominion of Adventure Falls, killing 1 million zombies.
  • : Clench was cleansed by a Level 1 Strike Force Tactical Zombie Elimination Squad from The Dominion of Adventure Falls, killing 1 million zombies.
  • : Clench was cleansed by a Level 1 Strike Force Tactical Zombie Elimination Squad from El naciones, killing 1 million zombies.
  • : Clench was cleansed by a Level 1 Strike Force Tactical Zombie Elimination Squad from El naciones, killing 1 million zombies.
  • : Clench was ravaged by a Zombie Burster Horde from The Empire of Halo Nova, infecting 1 million survivors.
  • : Clench was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Zombies and Most Dead and the Top 5% for Most Zombified.
  • : Clench was ravaged by a Zombie Shrieker Horde from The Republic of Kartoshechka, infecting 5 million survivors.
  • : Clench was ravaged by a Zombie Burster Horde from Meadowlark middle, infecting 69 million survivors.
  • : Clench was ravaged by a Zombie Burster Horde from Meadowlark middle, infecting 68 million survivors and converting to a zombie exporter! Oh no!

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