by Max Barry

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Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 2ndLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 6thLargest Insurance Industry: 6th
The Popsicle Pete Nation of
Corporate Police State
NONE OF YOU ARE SAFE!
Influence
Shoeshiner
Civil Rights
Unheard Of
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Outlawed

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Clench

Population32.666 billion

CapitalJoseph City
LeaderJoseph
FaithJosephism

Currencymoney
Animalviper

The Popsicle Pete Nation of Clench is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Joseph with an iron fist, and renowned for its flagrant waste-dumping, compulsory military service, and complete absence of social welfare. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless, devout population of 32.666 billion follower of Josephs are ruled with an iron fist by the corrupt, dictatorship government, which oppresses anyone who isn't on the board of a Fortune 500 company. Large corporations tend to be above the law, and use their financial clout to gain ever-increasing government benefits at the expense of the poor and unemployed.

The relatively small, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Industry and Healthcare also on the agenda, while Social Policy and Welfare aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Joseph City. The average income tax rate is 98.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Josephic economy, worth an astonishing 33,702 trillion monies a year, is broadly diversified and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Woodchip Exports, and Door-to-door Insurance Sales. Average income is a breathtaking 1,031,720 monies, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 3,405,694 per year while the poor average 233,833, a ratio of 14.6 to 1.

Children often explain to their parents that the Mega Ultimate Sword Fist was worth the thousand-money charge on their phone bill, the rainbow assortment of chemicals in the water has turned the frogs gay, red rinses are frequently applied to grey hair, and for just a few extra monies follower of Josephs can get new driving records with their new cars. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, despite the fact that it is difficult to make it through a day without breaking one of the country's many laws. Clench's national animal is the viper, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Josephism.

Clench is ranked 234,660th in the world and 6,453rd in the Rejected Realms for Most Politically Free, scoring 2.29 on the Diebold Election Inking Scale.

Top
1%
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 2ndLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 6thLargest Insurance Industry: 6thLargest Black Market: 7thHighest Average Incomes: 9thLargest Mining Sector: 10thHighest Economic Output: 14thLargest Cheese Export Sector: 15thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 18thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 20thLargest Agricultural Sector: 21stLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 22ndLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 28thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 93rdMost Subsidized Industry: 133rdMost Avoided: 143rdLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 144thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 145thMost Corrupt Governments: 156thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 171stLargest Governments: 179thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 187thMost Efficient Economies: 198thFattest Citizens: 306thLowest Crime Rates: 392ndMost Advanced Public Transport: 445thLargest Retail Industry: 765thHighest Poor Incomes: 975thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 1,025thMost Scientifically Advanced: 1,706thLargest Populations: 1,722ndHighest Average Tax Rates: 2,121stTop
5%
Largest Information Technology Sector: 4,516thLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 5,141stRudest Citizens: 5,428thMost Stationary: 7,545thMost Devout: 9,222ndHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 10,055thMost Conservative: 10,109thTop
10%
Largest Publishing Industry: 13,489thMost Advanced Public Education: 16,168thSmartest Citizens: 17,045thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 22,526thMost Influential: 22,757thMost Authoritarian: 23,783rd
Top
1%
Largest Agricultural Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionHighest Economic Output: 1st in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Timber Woodchipping Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 1st in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1st in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 1st in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 1st in the regionLargest Black Market: 1st in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 2nd in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 3rd in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 3rd in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 4th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 5th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 9th in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 10th in the regionLargest Governments: 10th in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 10th in the regionMost Avoided: 11th in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 12th in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 13th in the regionFattest Citizens: 20th in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 20th in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 31st in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 33rd in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 33rd in the regionLargest Populations: 37th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 51st in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 57th in the regionTop
5%
Most Stationary: 69th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 111th in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 129th in the regionRudest Citizens: 148th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 263rd in the regionMost Conservative: 265th in the regionTop
10%
Most Devout: 347th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 357th in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 374th in the regionMost Influential: 427th in the regionMost Extreme: 440th in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 465th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 527th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Clench was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Highest Unexpected Death Rate.
  • : Following new legislation in Clench, for just a few extra monies follower of Josephs can get new driving records with their new cars.
  • : Clench was reclassified from "Iron Fist Consumerists" to "Corporate Police State".
  • : Following new legislation in Clench, red rinses are frequently applied to grey hair.
  • : Following new legislation in Clench, the rainbow assortment of chemicals in the water has turned the frogs gay.
  • : Following new legislation in Clench, children often explain to their parents that the Mega Ultimate Sword Fist was worth the thousand-money charge on their phone bill.
  • : Following new legislation in Clench, a small country is wondering where their capitol building's gold dome went.
  • : Clench was ranked in the Top 10% of the world for Most Authoritarian.
  • : Following new legislation in Clench, photos of picturesque coastal buildings are set against a backdrop of smokestacks and ship hulls.
  • : Following new legislation in Clench, many believe that Joseph's head is big enough for the sun to orbit around it.

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