The Holy Empire of Chewitsaurus is a massive, orderly nation, ruled by Chewie the Chewitsaurus with an iron fist, and remarkable for its pith helmet sales, ritual sacrifices, and complete lack of public education. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, devout population of 1.448 billion Chewitsauri are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The tiny, corrupt, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Administration, Industry, and Law & Order also on the agenda, while Welfare and Education aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Juicy Bites. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 7.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Chewitsaurusian economy, worth 185 trillion Chewits a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Retail, Gambling, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is an impressive 127,918 Chewits, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 726,463 per year while the poor average 10,988, a ratio of 66.1 to 1.

The government's religious works are headed by a New Age guru, government police forces protect public schools from the threat of protest, people who make the leader's blood boil get boiled, and ship captains always order a return to port at the slightest sign of rain. Crime is all-pervasive, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Chewitsaurus's national animal is the Chewit dragon, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Xtreme twists.

Chewitsaurus is ranked 248,252^nd in the world and 6^th in Sainiti for Most Income Equality, scoring 1.51 on the Marx-Engels Emancipation Scale.