The Commonwealth of Cheloboria is a massive, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by President Elect with a fair hand, and remarkable for its ban on automobiles, anti-smoking policies, and smutty television. The compassionate, democratic population of 4.452 billion Cheloborians enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Tortoburg. The average income tax rate is 91.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Cheloborian economy, worth 555 trillion Shells a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing and Tourism. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 124,837 Shells, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Government theft from poor artists to give to rich allies has been dubbed the "reverse Robin Hood" policy, little kids often wonder why strange grown-ups are following them around the soft play areas, chickens frolic freely on swings and roundabouts in Tortoburg's playgrounds, and out-of-work actors say they can't complain. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Cheloboria's national animal is the Tortoise, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Maguffinism.

Cheloboria is ranked 32,397^th in the world and 92^nd in Forest for Highest Drug Use, scoring 99.6 on the Pineapple Fondness Rating.