by Max Barry

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Largest Pizza Delivery Sector: 6,344thLeast Corrupt Governments: 21,239thMost Extensive Civil Rights: 24,275th
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Cheesy Diplomatic Incidents

Population499 million

CapitalEmmental Metropolis


The Colony of Cheesy Diplomatic Incidents is a huge, socially progressive nation, notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, irreverence towards religion, and absence of drug laws. The hard-working, democratic population of 499 million Cheesy Diplomats hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The tiny, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Welfare, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Emmental Metropolis. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 7.0%.

The strong Cheesily Diplomatic economy, worth 26.4 trillion pizzas a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is fairly diversified and led by the Pizza Delivery industry, with major contributions from Gambling, Retail, and Soda Sales. Average income is 52,944 pizzas, with the richest citizens earning 5.8 times as much as the poorest.

Scientists regularly clone human beings for research purposes, the alarmingly racist TV show 'Bigtopians Say the Darndest Things' is a hit, immigrant herding has become a national pastime, and Cheesy Diplomatic Incidents has designated Emmental Metropolis as its capital city. Crime is a problem, probably because of the absence of a police force. Cheesy Diplomatic Incidents's national animal is the cow, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities.

Cheesy Diplomatic Incidents is ranked 33,081st in the world and 1st in The Cheese War for Most Politically Free, scoring 82 on the Diebold Election Inking Scale.

Largest Pizza Delivery Sector: 6,344thTop
Least Corrupt Governments: 21,239thMost Extensive Civil Rights: 24,275thHighest Drug Use: 25,775thLargest Gambling Industry: 27,961st

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