by Max Barry

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Most Advanced Public Transport: 6thMost Patriotic: 13thLargest Black Market: 19th
The Armed Republic of
Psychotic Dictatorship
Dílis go Bás
Donn
Influence
Shoeshiner
Region
Civil Rights
Unheard Of
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Outlawed

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Celtician

Population24.171 billion

CapitalTech Duinn
LeaderDonn
FaithThe Order of Donn

CurrencyOricalcum
AnimalWolf

The Armed Republic of Celtician is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Donn with an iron fist, and renowned for its smutty television, fear of technology, and ubiquitous missile silos. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 24.171 billion Celts are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, although Education and Industry are also considered important. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Tech Duinn. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Celticianian economy, worth an astonishing 20,477 trillion Oricalcums a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, fairly diversified black market in Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Uranium Mining. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 847,199 Oricalcums, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.1 times as much as the poorest.

Hordes of unemployed lumberjacks have resorted to cutting down utility poles to satisfy their cravings, buses are widely regarded as the safest way to travel, diplomats shake hands with their right and hide a poison dagger in their left, and the nation's new Mylab space station is notorious for being the loneliest place above the planet. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Celtician's national animal is the Wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is The Order of Donn.

Celtician is ranked 497th in the world and 25th in Lazarus for Largest Publishing Industry, scoring 44,825.42 on the Bella Potter Productivity e-Index.

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1%
Most Advanced Public Transport: 6thMost Patriotic: 13thLargest Black Market: 19thMost Advanced Defense Forces: 21stLowest Crime Rates: 25thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 31stLargest Governments: 33rdHighest Average Incomes: 35thHighest Poor Incomes: 35thMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 41stLargest Manufacturing Sector: 43rdMost Corrupt Governments: 47thHighest Average Tax Rates: 50thHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 51stMost Advanced Public Education: 57thMost Subsidized Industry: 79thHighest Economic Output: 89thLargest Information Technology Sector: 135thMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 157thMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 160thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 226thSmartest Citizens: 247thMost Efficient Economies: 394thLargest Publishing Industry: 497thMost Devout: 839thLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 974thLargest Mining Sector: 1,091stMost Cultured: 1,166thMost Beautiful Environments: 1,202ndMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 1,314thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 1,602ndLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 1,691stMost Scientifically Advanced: 1,958thTop
5%
Largest Welfare Programs: 2,598thLargest Agricultural Sector: 3,774thHealthiest Citizens: 3,854thMost Valuable International Artwork: 4,204thMost Stationary: 5,081stLargest Cheese Export Sector: 5,425thLargest Populations: 5,887thMost Authoritarian: 5,960thHighest Food Quality: 6,869thMost Influential: 12,858thTop
10%
Most Developed: 13,383rdMost Conservative: 22,147thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 23,348th
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Largest Governments: 1st in the regionMost Patriotic: 1st in the regionMost Advanced Public Transport: 1st in the regionHighest Foreign Aid Spending: 2nd in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 2nd in the regionLargest Black Market: 2nd in the regionLowest Crime Rates: 2nd in the regionMost Advanced Defense Forces: 2nd in the regionMost Extensive Public Healthcare: 2nd in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 2nd in the regionMost Advanced Public Education: 2nd in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 2nd in the regionHighest Average Tax Rates: 2nd in the regionMost Eco-Friendly Governments: 3rd in the regionHighest Economic Output: 3rd in the regionMost Subsidized Industry: 3rd in the regionMost Corrupt Governments: 3rd in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 3rd in the regionMost Popular Tourist Destinations: 7th in the regionLargest Information Technology Sector: 7th in the regionSmartest Citizens: 9th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 12th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 12th in the regionLargest Publishing Industry: 25th in the regionMost Devout: 37th in the regionMost Beautiful Environments: 39th in the regionLargest Mining Sector: 44th in the regionLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 45th in the regionMost Cultured: 49th in the regionMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 58th in the regionTop
5%
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 78th in the regionMost Scientifically Advanced: 87th in the regionMost Stationary: 88th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 94th in the regionLargest Welfare Programs: 105th in the regionMost Authoritarian: 160th in the regionLargest Populations: 161st in the regionMost Valuable International Artwork: 174th in the regionHealthiest Citizens: 185th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 186th in the regionMost Extreme: 221st in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 234th in the regionMost Influential: 276th in the regionTop
10%
Highest Food Quality: 357th in the regionMost World Assembly Endorsements: 679th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Following new legislation in Celtician, the nation's new Mylab space station is notorious for being the loneliest place above the planet.
  • : Following new legislation in Celtician, diplomats shake hands with their right and hide a poison dagger in their left.
  • : Following new legislation in Celtician, buses are widely regarded as the safest way to travel.
  • : Following new legislation in Celtician, hordes of unemployed lumberjacks have resorted to cutting down utility poles to satisfy their cravings.
  • : Following new legislation in Celtician, minefields are being deployed along the border to discourage potential emigrants from trying to leave.
  • : Following new legislation in Celtician, in life full of care there is no time to stop and stare.
  • : Following new legislation in Celtician, squeaky high prepubescent voices recite the patriotic poem "Hail to The Leader!" before each meal.
  • : Following new legislation in Celtician, mantis shrimp studies is academia's fastest-growing field.
  • : Following new legislation in Celtician, it is illegal to distribute Girl Guide Cookies without an advanced food hygiene diploma.
  • : Following new legislation in Celtician, it is said that a Celticianian woman's work is never done.

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