The Kingdom of Caybow is a colossal, genial nation, ruled by Baconslushy with a fair hand, and notable for its pith helmet sales, ban on automobiles, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic population of 5.259 billion Caybowians enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Philia. The average income tax rate is 72.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Caybowian economy, worth 383 trillion Bows a year, is quite specialized and mostly made up of the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Tourism, and Trout Farming. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 72,956 Bows, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Voting for pro-Bigtopian candidates is voluntary, the government has cut taxes in the face of widespread tax evasion, multilingual concierges man empty inner city apartment blocks, and retirement homes are filled with foreign war criminals. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Caybow's national animal is the Wolf, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Caybow is ranked 217,699^th in the world and 6,918^th in Lazarus for Most Armed, with 0.16 Weapons Per Person.