by Max Barry

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Most Armed: 1,671st Largest Insurance Industry: 1,771st Largest Gambling Industry: 2,510th
The Lost Holy Land of
Capitalist Paradise
Sic Semper Tyrannosaurus Rex
Regional Influence
Civil Rights
Political Freedom

Overview People Government Economy Rank Trend

The Lost Holy Land of Cantfinditonamapistan is a gargantuan, efficient nation, remarkable for its barren, inhospitable landscape, vat-grown people, and parental licensing program. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 12.024 billion Cantfinditonamapistanians are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The minute, pro-business government, or what there is of one, is dominated by the Department of Defense, with Industry and Education also on the agenda, while Social Policy and Spirituality are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of The Lost City of Zorg. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 2.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Cantfinditonamapistanian economy, worth a remarkable 1,318 trillion Currencies a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Gambling industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Information Technology, and Retail. Average income is an impressive 109,644 Currencies, but there is a large disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 452,792 per year while the poor average 17,455, a ratio of 25.9 to 1.

Corporations claim the third ounce of any metal traded in a wicker-cone on the Sunday of a full moon as a charitable expense, pollution is on the rise along with government approvals of fracking projects, the Cantfinditonamapistanian Arts Council pays teenagers to sit through opera performances, and the government spends twice as much reclaiming lost settlements from the sea as it could've on coastal defences. Crime is pervasive, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Cantfinditonamapistan's national animal is the Spotted Tree Squid, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to heavy metals seepage into national waterways.

Cantfinditonamapistan is ranked 84,865th in the world and 4,129th in the Pacific for Highest Drug Use, scoring 64.6 on the Pineapple Fondness Rating.

Most Armed: 1,671stLargest Insurance Industry: 1,771stTop
Largest Gambling Industry: 2,510thLowest Overall Tax Burden: 2,910thHighest Crime Rates: 3,562ndLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 3,886thRudest Citizens: 4,667thLargest Retail Industry: 5,571stMost Avoided: 6,679thHighest Economic Output: 7,450thFattest Citizens: 8,038thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 8,968thTop
Largest Populations: 9,468thMost Secular: 11,047thHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 11,364thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 12,454thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 12,575thMost Efficient Economies: 13,188thGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 13,269thHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 14,108thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 15,345thMost Pro-Market: 16,304thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 17,421st
Most Armed: 34th in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 37th in the regionLargest Insurance Industry: 42nd in the regionLowest Overall Tax Burden: 57th in the regionLargest Populations: 76th in the regionTop
Highest Crime Rates: 98th in the regionHighest Economic Output: 103rd in the regionLargest Furniture Restoration Industry: 104th in the regionRudest Citizens: 105th in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 143rd in the regionMost Avoided: 147th in the regionFattest Citizens: 207th in the regionHighest Wealthy Incomes: 251st in the regionLargest Manufacturing Sector: 293rd in the regionLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 312th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 346th in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 347th in the regionLargest Black Market: 352nd in the regionHighest Unexpected Death Rate: 422nd in the regionTop
Most Secular: 457th in the regionGreatest Rich-Poor Divides: 502nd in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 569th in the regionMost Pro-Market: 746th in the regionHighest Average Incomes: 796th in the regionMost Developed: 818th in the region

National Happenings

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