The Vampire Syndicate of Black Ivars is a gargantuan, cultured nation, ruled by Methuselah Ţepeș with an iron fist, and renowned for its infamous sell-swords, pith helmet sales, and enslaved workforce. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 35.061 billion Nosferatus are ruled by a mostly-benevolent dictator, who grants the populace the freedom to live their own lives but watches carefully for anyone to slip up.

The medium-sized, corrupt, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Industry, Healthcare, and Education also on the agenda, while Welfare and Social Policy aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Crypt. The average income tax rate is 78.6%.

The frighteningly efficient undead economy, worth a remarkable 9,576 trillion blood barrels a year, is quite specialized and mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, Retail, and Uranium Mining. Average income is an amazing 273,125 blood barrels, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.2 times as much as the poorest.

Engine room hooch is the drink of choice among the nation's navy, the military is on a massive recruiting drive in advance of an invasion of Brasilistan, economists have been named Invertebrates of the Year, and Methuselah Ţepeș is called 'Patches' at international summits. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Black Ivars's national animal is the bat, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is necromancy.

Black Ivars is ranked 95,985^th in the world and 3,480^th in the South Pacific for Highest Drug Use, scoring 71.2 on the Pineapple Fondness Rating.