The Federal Republic of Birkanie is a huge, genial nation, remarkable for its frequent executions, irreverence towards religion, and devotion to social welfare. The democratic population of 658 million Birkaniens are highly moralistic and fiercely conservative, in the sense that they tend to believe most things should be outlawed. People who have good jobs and work quietly at them are lauded; others are viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized, moralistic government prioritizes Welfare, with Education, Law & Order, and Healthcare also on the agenda, while Spirituality receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Birka-Cité. The average income tax rate is 34.6%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but inefficient Birkaniean economy, worth 28.8 trillion Birkoes a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Woodchip Exports industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Cheese Exports, and Basket Weaving. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is 43,827 Birkoes, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.6 times as much as the poorest.

The government officially wants you to slow down and speak more clearly, fewer people are bathing as citizens must show ration stamps before they can turn on their faucets, elected officials often serve for decades in a single term, and foreign policy is mostly just to smile and hope for the best. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Birkanie's national animal is the Dauphin, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Birkanie is ranked 103,942^nd in the world and 1,754^th in The East Pacific for Largest Insurance Industry, scoring 2,176.42 on the Risk Expulsion Effectiveness Rating.